Sugar scrub tree hut recipe
Edible tree leaves pt 2
2023.05.31 17:10 Joeyplantstrees Edible tree leaves pt 2
 | A bit ago, I made a post about edible tree leaves and had a lot of people ask for more so I drew 8 more, and then I tried combining them all into a little coloring ebook and since Ive gotten a lot of positive response to those and needed to make the pages fit and flow right and had a large gap on each one, so I ended writing recipes for each one while I was at it. Which, a cookbook wasn’t what I was planning on doing when I got up this morning but here it is now. submitted by Joeyplantstrees to foraging [link] [comments] The coloring/ebook is available on my Etsy, but most of the info minus the recipes is for free right here in this post. The ebook is just if you want to support me or print the pages out. https://www.etsy.com/listing/1493241397/edible-tree-leaves-coloring-bookcookbook A tree once synonymous with the American countryside, American Elm (Ulmus americana) has multiple edible parts. The samaras (winged seed pods similar to maple spinners) and young leaves are both edible. The leaves have a slight mucilaginous texture (think okra). The inner bark has also been used as a traditional food source, but due to this and other species of elms native to the American Elms have been heavily effected by Dutch Elm disease, so the inner bark should be avoided and harvesting anything else should be only from healthy populations. You should also help propagate any populations you take from. Chinese Toon (Toona sinensis), or xiāng chūn 香椿 in its native China is a mainstay in several Asian cuisines. Xiāng means aromatic and gives away the selling point of this tree as an edible. The young leaves are often consumed for their unique flavor that is a combination of onion, garlic and shallot. The flowers are also edible, and are usually consumed when they’re young and have a more mild flavor. In addition to edible leaves, the Eastern Cottonwood (Populus deftoides) has buds that can be harvested in early spring before they fully open and have a pleasant balsamic like scent. The inner bark has also traditionally been used as a survival food. The barks and buds blabber traditionally been used by tribes such as the Haudensaunee, the Mohegan, the Kakota, Arapaho, etc. for it’s pain relieving and anti inflammatory effects. Like other Ash trees, the introduction of Emerald Ash borer (Agrilus planipennis) has done considerable damage to its population. I choose Green Ash (Fraxinus pennsylvanica) for this list because unlike many other American Ash species, it is at least not currently listed as endangered but any harvesting should be done cautiously and respectfully from healthy populations. The seeds can be eaten raw or collected and ground into flour and young leaves can also be eaten raw. A very common fruit tree that’s rarely appreciated, the Hackberry’s (Celtis occidentalis) name comes from the Old English haecce meaning bird, which is predominately what eats its fruit and spreads this tree. The berries (technically dropes or stone fruit), unlike most fruit, are calorie dense and high in fat, carbohydrates and protein that are easily digestible raw. On top of that, the young leaves are completely edible. One of the more well known examples of cauliflory (flowers growing directly from branches and trunks), Redbuds put on an early display of bright edible flowers before it’s leaves even appear. Less known is that the seeds, twigs and leaves are also edible and can be tapped for syrup. It’s sometimes called the love tree due to its bright red flowers and heart shaped leaves. Redbuds are also nitrogen fixing trees, enriching the soil around them. Also called Juneberries or Saskatoons, with well known tart edible berries. The young shoots and leaves are also fully edible, as well as the seeds that can be ground as a flour or used as a thickener. The name serviceberry is thought to have derived from the arrival of the berries in spring serving as a reliable marker for when the ground was thawed enough for burial services to be held in early North American settlements. Uncommon for trees, Spice Bush (Lindera benzoin) has berries with spicy, aromatic flavor similar to a combination of cloves, cinamon and allspice. The twigs barks and leaves are also edible, with a slightly more citrusy taste than the fruit that leads to them often being used as a spice from which it gets it’s name. It is the primary host plant of the spicebush swallowtail butterfly. All of these can be tapped for syrup, although Green Ash and Serviceberry are the only two with a notable history of ever being used as such. |
2023.05.31 17:03 Drexxit What's happening with this (sugar?) Maple Tree?
submitted by Drexxit to arborists [link] [comments]
2023.05.31 16:47 alfycain Want a high calorie drink that is not filling
I want to gain weight but cannot increase the amount of food I eat without feeling too full or getting indigestion. I'm hoping I might be able to consume a high calorie drink between meals that will not upset my stomach or fill me up so I won't have to cut back on my regular meals.
The problem with pre-made drinks is that they have ingredients that don't agree with me, like sugar, fruit, sweeteners or milk. Compleat, which makes high calorie drinks, has recipes for blending your own shakes. The recipes have ingredients like broccoli, carrots, rice, baked potatoes and chicken. Can someone tell me if they think I could make a 350+ calorie drink from these ingredients that would not fill me up too much? I'd like to have opinions on this before I spend money on a blender.
submitted by alfycain to weightgain [link] [comments]
The problem with pre-made drinks is that they have ingredients that don't agree with me, like sugar, fruit, sweeteners or milk. Compleat, which makes high calorie drinks, has recipes for blending your own shakes. The recipes have ingredients like broccoli, carrots, rice, baked potatoes and chicken. Can someone tell me if they think I could make a 350+ calorie drink from these ingredients that would not fill me up too much? I'd like to have opinions on this before I spend money on a blender.
2023.05.31 16:27 Deltiasgaming1 ESO Necrom Chapter: Essential Tips to Prepare for the Arcanist Class
 | Reddit gang, dropping this here so you can prepare for Necrom Chapter and Arcanist class when it drops on June 5th for PC and June 20th for consoles. I hope this helps you get prepared! submitted by Deltiasgaming1 to u/Deltiasgaming1 [link] [comments] Written Guide: https://deltiasgaming.com/eso-necrom-chapter-essential-tips-to-prepare-for-the-arcanist-class/ Video Guide: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dZMoO6vKeWo ESO Builds: Update 38 - https://deltiasgaming.com/best-eso-builds-update-38-necrom-chapte ESO Necrom Chapter: Essential Tips to Prepare for the Arcanist ClassESO Necrom Chapter is just around the corner, so prepare for Arcanist Class with our Top 15 Essential Tips and level up quickly!https://preview.redd.it/3bxobreev73b1.png?width=800&format=png&auto=webp&s=0f2dd685f712f4ae730fba6b1035795374ce99af The Necrom chapter launches on June 5th and June 20th, so you have very little time to prepare everything for the new class. In our guide, we included tips and pieces of advice we learned after countless hours and multiple characters leveled in ESO. ESO Necrom Chapter: Essential Tips to Prepare for the Arcanist ClassIn ESO, levelling a new character can be costly, long, and complex. Only the base game offers multiple skill lines, champion points, and guilds. You may be lost quickly if you are a beginner or play eso occasionally. What is the best race? How do you level up so that when you hit max level (50 and 160cp), you can jump straight to end-game content and feel powerful? We have answers to all those questions and more in our 15 simple essential tips to prepare for the new Necrom Chapter and the Arcanist Class in ESO.Select PlaystyleArcanist Class has many skills to enhance a unique, never seen in ESO before playstyle. As a result, in the Builds, we try to enhance the class identity. The following list explains shortly all you need to know about the new ESO class:
https://preview.redd.it/3tvg877rv73b1.png?width=800&format=png&auto=webp&s=851e2d0d780c4c1a7ce761a87e387dd8eb020e2b The Arcanist uses abilities to create and consume Cruxes, small triangular glyphs floating around the character (3 max). You will use specific skills to generate Cruxes and additional abilities that consume them, amplifying abilities and triggering important class passives. Crux consumption could provide more damage, longer duration, cheaper resource cost, and more healing. Additionally, it generates and activates important passives. For example, Crux-consumption can give you more weapon/spell or critical damage. The more you use Cruxes, the better. The following brief guide explains the combat with the ESO Arcanist class in builds:
DPS:As a damage dealer (DPS), The Arcanist excels in stamina DPS. Primarily due to a variety of factors like medium armor passives, dual wield passives and medium armor choices that carry damage. Can you do well as a magicka based Arcanist damage dealer? Yes, but in group settings, medium armor excels due to its passive critical damage vs light armor penetration passive. If you want optimal, high end DPS, we recommend stamina based Arcanist as of the making of this guide.Tank:Tanking on the Arcanist is exception with crowd control, unique buffs and debuffs. The fact that you have a built in class taunt along with built in major and minor breach means you can use different gear and weapon choices. The Arcanist also has Minor Courage passive which is exceptional for group play. Consider them one of the best tanks in PvE or PvP at launch.Healer:Similar to tanking, the Arcanist healing is exception due to the buffs and passives. While the main burst heal, or lack thereof is weak, it makes up for it with huge buffs and debuffs that every team wants. Current, the Arcanist is an exceptional healer, just use Restoration Staff abilities for burst healing rather than in class skills.Player Vs Player: In PvP, the Arcanist is quite weak compared to other classes. It lacks a burst heal, or delayed burst damage skill, and the class really wants you to use the Fatecarver skill “beam.” This is fine in PvE where enemies rarely stun or disrupt you, but in PvP, this isn’t the case. The class does have strong passives, and ultimate selections and with either a proc heavy loadout in melee, or a ranged beam build you can make it work. Opinion: we recommend playing the Arcanist a stamina-based damage dealer for both PvE and PvP. Race Choicehttps://preview.redd.it/f4h5zq7uv73b1.png?width=800&format=png&auto=webp&s=6cdfdabc8bf380e78216b5ee971eb27778fea981 Does Race Matter in ESO? In general, no, you may get a maximum of 8% increased DPS going from an Argonian (weakest) to Khajiit/Dunmer (strongest). Most players won’t feel this unless they are trying to do bleeding-edge content. However, we do have some strong choices and recommendations for those looking to mid-max their Arcanist.
Dark Elf is a great secondary choice. What makes Dunmer’s (Dark Elves) great as damage dealers is balanced weapon/spell damage and max stamina and magicka pools. Major downside is the lack of any resource sustain or health. High Elf is the recommended choice for magicka damage dealer Arcanist. The reason why, High Elf has a unique 5% damage reduction while channeling. This helps take less damage using your main channel as a damage dealer or a healer. The racial choice also has great passives for damage and resource sustain. Dark Elf is also a great choice for magicka damage dealers for the same reasons its great on stamina. Breton is the recommended racial choice for healing. With strong resource sustain, max stats, you will always be able to cast your skills when you need them. Argonian also makes a great healer and is usually an optimal choice for PvP. I would recommend an Imperial for reduced ultimate cost and cost of your abilities as a Tank. Nord Race has a quick ultimate generation. Don't freak out about the race you can always change with the race change token, and you must love your character. Picking FactionThere are fantastic players in every faction, which doesn't matter in PvE unless you plan to play PvP with your friends in Imperial City, Cyrodiil or Battlegrounds. For maximum potential builds in PvP "Any race, any alliance" feature, available from the crown store, will allow you to pick any race regardless of your alliance. It's a one-time purchase and of the most useful purchases in ESO.Also, you can change Alliance with another very expensive token from the crown store. Storage SpaceGet storage boxes in your house for supplies, including gear, potions, food, etc., everything you are going to need to start leveling your new Arcanist character. When Necrom Chapter goes live, you can equip it and enjoy the class. https://preview.redd.it/g8ikhzv9w73b1.png?width=800&format=png&auto=webp&s=f7b35dd13c6c144c0225dd755e1e48abc072f524 You can buy storage chests from Writs Vandor, located in each faction's main City (Grahtwood, Stormhaven, Ebonheart) with master crafting writ vouchers. Boxes are also available for Tel Var Stones in Imperial City Vendors or from the Crown store. Each player can own up to 4 large (60 slots) and 4 small (30 slots) chests. There are 360 slots available in total. XP BoostersIf it's your first time playing ESO. I would not recommend the fast grind method, play slow and enjoy the game, though you can likewise use all XP boosters. However, if you're like me and have leveled multiple characters, you can start saving XP boosters now for an optimal way to rush to the end game.The fastest way to level is to kill mobs with ESO XP boosters. You want to maximise the number of killed enemies per second. The Blackrose Prison Arena and Skyreach Catacombs are my preferred grinding spots. Here’s how you can maximize your XP gains if you’re in a rush to the end game:
To make the process even faster, you can make multiple sets of training armor (for levels 3, 10, 20, 30, 40 etc.) to make sure you stay powerful as you grind your way to 50. So that's when the storage boxes come in handy. Store all gear sets there and be ready for the grind. PvP BoostersLeveling PvP skill lines are important due to the passives and active abilities that everyone uses, even if you play PvE. For example, Reviving Barrier is an extremely useful ultimate skill in PvP and PvE for tanks, healers and, sometimes, damage dealers. Also, reaching support rank 9 grants Magicka Aid and increases your Magicka Recovery by 10% for each Support ability slotted.https://preview.redd.it/ujdt600fw73b1.png?width=400&format=png&auto=webp&s=ea8b91fa9ae87910c82379624d716e8afd6641cf Once you hit Level 10, you'll receive the invitation to Cyrodiil and start the introduction to PvP Quest. Upon completion, you'll get an alliance rank three, and two skill points. It's a good start, so you should never skip it. Nextly, you can level alliance skill lines quickly on a new character if you use a Colovian War Torte and play low-level battlegrounds. Colovian War Torte is a craftable consumable that grants a 50% alliance point boost for 30 minutes. It is affected by the Connoisseur and Brewer passives from the Provisioning skill line. Despite being categorized as a food when crafting, the tortes can be consumed at the same time as regular foods and drinks. The 30-minute duration pauses if you log out and can be used as early as level 10. The Molten War Torte and White-Gold War Torte are more powerful versions which grant 100% and 150% experience boosts, respectively. Note that while these items do provide a bonus to gains towards your Alliance War rank and skill lines, this bonus does not apply to leaderboard scores. Gold for InventoryThe next essential tip on how to prepare for the Arcanist class and ESO Necrom Chapter is crucial Inventory Space. Save gold to max out your new Arcanist character carrying capacity. Each character that you create in The Elder Scrolls Online will start with 60 slots. You can increase the characters' inventory space by buying Pack Merchant upgrades up to 140 in total inventory Upgrades from Pack Merchant cost 179 700 Gold. Also, train your horse in the stable master to increase it by extra 60 slots to reach 200 inventory spaces in total. If you own a guild, you can also use its Bank for extra 500 item slots. Lastly, special pets from Crown Store can increase the inventory capacity by additional 20 slots.Mount SpeedLike mentioned above, you can buy an upgrade for your mount at any stablemaster in towns. Each point in carry capacity will permanently increase your characters' inventory space by 1. You can only upgrade one of the thee mount perks every 20 hours.However, you can speed up the process of horse upgrades if you own any riding lessons. Sometimes those upgrade items are part of daily login rewards or can be bought from the crown store. So check up on your stored daily rewards. This can give you a nice early start on your new arcanist. As mentioned before leveling your PVP skills is essential, the Continuous Attack passive will give you a 30% mount speed boost and unlocks at Assault Rank 3. Alchemy Matshttps://preview.redd.it/4r499lcjw73b1.png?width=800&format=png&auto=webp&s=51d9b3866a804ea16ae15992b8de45aaef33debc The alchemy skill line is necessary to level up on each character because of the Medicinal Use Passive that makes resulting effects last 30% longer and is a key to better combat performance. As a result, if you're using potions, you get more Recovery Weapon or Spell damage or whatever potion buff you have. Consuming potions in ESO has a 45-second cooldown, and with the Medicinal Use Passive, they last 47.5 seconds, which essentially gives you 100% uptime in combat, assuming you're consuming them on cooldown. So, buy enough alchemy items to max out the alchemy skill, cheap ingredients, in guide traders, like buying and mixing wormwood or spider eggs with scrib jelly will get you from 1 to 50 quickly. Change out your solvent, you can start with Ichor, and as you level up, finish with Alkahest. Take advantage of this potion passive right away. Trust me, at the end-game, it really helps your survivability with resource sustain and running Buffs on cooldown. ConsumablesThe best food to prepare is the one that works at all levels, for example, Artaeum Pickled Fish Bowl, Candied Jester's Coins etc. you can get those recipes just by playing during in-game events, collecting rewards or from guild traders.Jewels of MisruleDuring leveling, I highly recommend Jewels of Misrule for beginning players without a lot of champion points because it gives max health and extra recovery and really carries your survivability. Additionally, it’s cheap.Witchmother's Potent BrewFor magic users, Witchmother's Potent Brew it's going to give you Max Magicka, Max Health and Magicka Recovery.Dubious Camoran ThroneStamina-based users can use Dubious Camoran Throne similar to Whitchmoder purple food but increases your Max Stamina Stats.You can make potions yourself, buy them from Crown Store or from daily rewards. You can also use the Endeavors system to buy some consumables. Another good option is Alliance potions for Alliance Points if you play PvP. You can buy them from Alliance Siege Merchants in Cyrodiil main gates or Battleground vendors in any major city. Alliance potions give these really important Buffs, and it'll help increase your damage and survivability. Start collecting those consumables and put them in your bank or storage chest so you can have them available right away for your Arcanist. Repair Kits/Soul GemsStock up on repair kits and Soulgems, especially if you’re grinding monsters. The normal repair kits you can get from Crafting writs or buying from guild traders. Additionally, you can obtain the special group repair kit for tickets from Impresario Vendor, who can be found in every big city.Master Writshttps://preview.redd.it/vtrh4krnw73b1.png?width=800&format=png&auto=webp&s=b972a52570696e8c65606753540ec86d76f8bf83For those that want to max your arcanist fast without grinding, is by using Master Crafting writs. Master writs are the fastest way, making you capable of reaching level 50 within 30 minutes. With a 150% xp boost from food and eso+, you only need 215 total alchemy or enchanting writs to reach level 50. Here is what to do if you want to level up quickly in eso by using Master Writs:
Transmuteshttps://preview.redd.it/l1wvfkgqw73b1.png?width=742&format=png&auto=webp&s=c5b3e40d9cc9118a2776296062003dfb624d2937 https://preview.redd.it/ez0fylarw73b1.png?width=761&format=png&auto=webp&s=92bc1bf726d6bf9d5a7ec45751a3a3f0daee5b0e Stock up on transmute stones by doing daily random dungeons, Battlegrounds or reaching tier 1 rewards in the Cyrodiil campaign on all your characters. Reaching tier 1 rewards can be completed by simply preparing the walls in Keeps, no PvP is required. Buy stone repair kits from Siege merchant, place them in your quick slot menu and repair damaged keep walls. You'll reach tier one quickly. New sets are coming with ESO Necrom Chapter, and some of them will surely be used for the arcanist class, so it's an essential tip to be prepared and stacked up on transmutes. Maxing Craftinghttps://preview.redd.it/kxvr7ngtw73b1.png?width=770&format=png&auto=webp&s=39bdae68f8045a7a249f644f2300212bd47bc3dd If you are interested in maxing out all the crafting lines on your arcanist, then you can pre-purchase intricate items from guild traders to deconstruct. Let them sit in your mailbox, and loot the mail on your arcanist to get a leg up in crafting quickly. Be sure to unlock the green CP "Inspiration boost" to make this even faster. Gear pieces with the intricate trait can drop from any monster or crafting writs so hold on to them and place them in your storage chest or bank and be ready to level crafting on your new Arcanist character. End Game SetsThere are just a ton of great sets that I use in my builds but here is a list of all great End-Game sets that are worth collecting for your Arcanist:Damage Dealers:
Healers:Tanks:PvP:ESO had hundreds of sets, and this list is also long, so what to focus on? If you’re reading this, We're assuming you want to get powerful quickly and reach end-game content, so that’s what we will gear for.Also, here are some essential tips for Leveling skill lines to max out skill points, skill lines and morphs and be ready for anything in-game:
ESO Articles, Guides, and BuildsThank you for reading the ESO Necrom Chapter: Essential Tips to Prepare for the Arcanist Class Guide! Also, consider watching me on Twitch. Feel free to ask me questions about my builds and the games I play, or check out my YouTube Channel. |
2023.05.31 16:15 igorcarbex16 Bully Soundtrack References & Similarities in Details...
https://preview.redd.it/ahl29u0mu73b1.jpg?width=453&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0d37661c842a119f0ed83740ec3eebdaf7b35e47
Hello Bully it's me again, The Bully soundtrack composed by the genius Shawn Lee is pretty rad, so as a music enthusiastic, i want to share this post for people really obsessed with the Bully songs like me, tried to include every song in the game like as puzzle pieces getting together with the greatest amount, most accurate and similar as possible in one sitting, with some help around the internet, personal discoveries and songs already mentioned for yourselves so thank you nonetheless, and sorry for the repetition. Unfortunately some will still be missing so "a little help"/hits for these unreferenced sounds are very welcome.
Some songs are pretty obvious but others looks well hidden, but that's the fun of it, not every song is a sample, they just sound alike or has interpolations.
I know it would be boring to reading all of this so also dedicated this YouTube playlist in details for, so that you can check thoroughly for a more accurate comparison: 😎👍 - Have Fun! https://m.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLtZ1VivcLOsiTtYHUrK-xw8OHZZAeOzRf
★ Main Storyline
·Welcome to Bullworth (Menu theme): Suspiria Theme - Goblin
·This Is Your School: The Duck - Shawn Lee
·The Setup/Bait/The Gym is Burning: Organ Donor - DJ Shadow
·Slingshot/Revenge on Mr. Burton "Part 3" (Fun): My Sweet Lord - George Harrionson the ex-Beatles & Bill Preston
·Save Algie: Love My Way - Psychedelic Furs
·Defend Bucky/The Eggs/Weed KilleStronghold Assault (Action): Shake, Shake, Shake - KC & The Sunshine Band, A Little Less Conversation - Elvis Presley, Hocus Pocus - Focus
·That B****/The Diary/Jealous Johnny/Paparazzi: This Must Be The Place (Naive Melody) - Talking Heads
·The Candidate/Cook's Date: Oh Yeah - Yello
·Halloween/The Big Prank: The Chase - Shawn Lee, Burning Bridges - The Republic From The Getaway Game - Shawn Lee
·Help Gary: Cannonball - Breeders (it also reminds me the "X-Files Theme - Mark Snow" but this is overthinking)
·Character Sheets: Agent Woodrow - The Woodies
·Hattrick vs. Galloway: Cat Blues - Seatbelts (Drum Patterns)
·Movie Tickets (Sneaking On A Date): All Mine, Glory Box - both by Portished
·Carnival Date (Romance): Kiss The Sky - Shawn Lee's Ping Pong Orchestra (also features in "Tales from the Bordelands Episode 2")
·Prep Challenge/Boxing Challenge: Drums on Phasing - Joe Ufer (Sample)
·Race the Vale/Lola's Race: Casio VL-1 Tone (Sampler) *a lot of songs use this instrument for samples, for Bully this is predominant in bike races, it also reminds the iconic song "Funkytown - Lipps inc."
·Beach Rumble: Tenebre 12 mix - Claudio Simonetti
·Tad's House: Billie Jean (Bass Only) - Michael Jackson
·Tagging/Making a Mark (Wildstyle): Chic - Good Times
·Wrong Part of Town/Busting In, Part I: Prog Punk, Psyche Drums (*After The Release!) - Shawn Lee's Ping Pong Orchestra
·The Tenements/Norton Boss Fight: Human Fly - Cramps, I Wanna Be Your Dog - Iggy Pop & the Stooges
·The Rumble/Defender of the Castle (Epic Confrontation): Matador - X Mal Deutschland (as the "wildstyle" music many songs are similar to this, i listed the most accurate or the most fun imo, at least)
·Nerd Challenge/Consumo Arcade (Menu): Sakura, Sakura - Traditional Japanese Folk Song
·Nerd Challenge/Consumo (Main): Four Thousand Years of Chinese History - SNK Sound Team from Fatal Fury: King of Fighters Game
·Glass House/Smash It Up (Destruction/Vandalism): Rapture - Blondie, The Breaks - Kurtis Blow
·Nice Outfit: Odetta - Hit or Miss (Drum Patterns), Dig Your Own Hole - Chemical Brothers (Drum Patterns)
·The Big Game (Nerds "Agent")/Revenge on Mr. Burton "Part 2": Big Bad Wolf - Shawn Lee
·Rats in the Library: You Rock My World - Michael Jackson, Spies In The Wires - Cabaret Voltaire
·Preppies Vandalized (Punishment): D12 40 Oz. - Mr. Stan
·Busting In, Part II/Paper Route: Identity - X-Ray Spec, Mongoloid - Devo
·Showdown at the Plant (Overture): "Saracens Theme" - The Warriors Game
·Complete Mayhem (Street Fight): Criminal - Fiona Apple (also resembles "All Caps - Madvillain-Madvillainy or MF Doom" and "Intermezzo 2 - Mr. chop" but this was released in 2009)
·School's Out (End Credits): Walk On The Wild Side (Bass and Rhythm Pattern) - Lou Reed by Velvet Underground
\Christmas is Here, Small Offences, Discreet Deliveries, The Collector, Mailbox Armageddon and Go See The Principal doesn't feature a unique theme or has any song.*
★ Miscellaneous, Ambience & Shop themes
·Chase Prefect and Police: The Shaft intro and end themes - Isaac Hayes, Beat Dis (12 Version) - Bomb The Bass
·Chase Adults/A Little Help: Take California - Propellerheads, Secret Agent - Bjorn Lynne
·Detention/Mowing Laws - Unused track from The Warrior Game (it doesn't have an actual name, sorry)
·Bike Race 1: Casio VL-1 Tone (Sampler)
·Bike Race 2: Sonic CD Game - Wacky Workbench Zone - Bad Future
·Kart Race (Main) or "Lowrider": You Baby - The Turtles
·Kart Race (Beta): Baba Hya - Lafayette Afro Rock Band
·General Store "Yum Yum Market": Cover Girl - Gabriele Ducros
·Hair Saloon (Poor) "The Final Cut": Punky Dragster - Tele Music
·Hair Saloon (Rich) "Old Bullworth Vale": Dance Feeling - Tele Music
·Clothing Store (Poor) "Worn In Used Clothing": Disco Revisited - Tele Music
·Clothing Store (Rich) "Aquaberry Outlet" (*After The Release!): Now That Is Jazz - Charlie's Bistro Ensemble
·Janitor's Room: Lonesome Heart Swing - Dennis Caplinger
·Carnival Ambience "Billy Crane's Traveling Carnival": Golden Brown - Stranglers
·Box Club Ambience "Glass Jaw Boxing Club": Icy Nation - Tele Music
·Preppie's Hideout Beach "Lighthouse" (*After The Release!): With My Maker I Am One - Chill Coffehouse Drip
·Dragon's Wing Comic Store (*After The Release!): Daniel Loves Singing - C. Allocco
·Nerd's Hideout "Dragon's Wing Comic Store" (Under): Soaring Song - Tele Music
·Jock's Hideout "Jock's Clubhouse": Grand Theft Auto (Song) - Craig Conner
·Monkey Fling (Menu): it reresemble Super Mario World Overworld theme
·Future Street Racer (Main): The Doom - Shadow The Hedgehog 2005 Game
★ Xmas Themes
Holiday themes features various artists, this list is based on the ones made by Shawn lee itself for his album "A Very Ping Pong Christmas: Funky Treats form Santa's Bag", The original composers is on the song description.
·Balls of Snow: Carol of the Bells - Mykola Leontovych
·Miracle on Bullworth St.: Jingle Bells - James Lord Pierpont
·Rudy the Red Nosed Santa: O Come All Ye Faithful (Adeste Fideles) - John Francis Wade & Frederick Oakeley
·Nutcrackin': Deck The Halls - Thomas Oliphant, Little Dummer Boy - Katherine Kennicott Davis, Harry Simeone & Henry Onorati
·Bike Shop (Xmas) "Shiny Bikes": Let it Snow! - Gary Hoey (Dean Martin is the original composer) (Most famous by Frank Sinatra)
·Clothing Store (Poor) (Xmas) "Worn In"/Clothing Store (Rich) (Xmas) "Aquaberry": Jingle Bells (Dan The Automator) - Dean Martin, *the Aquaberry outlet uses a different tone in jazz
·Janitor's Room (Xmas)/Hair Saloon (Poor)(Xmas) "The Final Cut": Up On The House Top (Ho, Ho, Ho) - Gene Autry
·Dragon's Wing Comic Store (Xmas)/Hair Saloon (Rich)(Xmas)"Old Bullworth Vale": We Wish You a Merry Christmas - Traditional English (Britain) Folk Song
·Xmas Tree: Dance Of The Sugar-Plum Fairy - Piotr Ilitch Tchaikovski
\The General Store "Yum Yum Market" reuses a song collage of various themes as Deck the Halls, We Wish You a Merry Christmas and Jingle Bells in that order on looping.*
★ Classes
·Music classes features American Folk and American March Songs since the game takes place in USA
Class 1: Turkey In The Straw
Class 2: Masterpiece Fanfare
Class 3: She'll Be Coming 'Round the Mountain
Class 4: Liberty Bell March (also known as "Monty Python Theme")
Class 5: The Washington Post March (also sounds similar to "Willian Tell Act" by Charlie Chaplin)
·English Class: Piéces de Clavecin en concert; La Timide - Jean-Philippe Rameau
·Art Class: Come With the Night (Drum Patterns) - Sugar Stick (also resembles "Test Area - Broadcast" or "Serpent Magique - Tangerine Dream")
·Photography Class/BMX Park (*After The Release!): Automatic - Shawn Lee & AM (for observation, the Bike Park and Photography theme are slightly different, not the same)
·Biology: Dara Factor One - Weather Report Music, Heist in Helsinki (*After The Release!) - Shawn Lee's Ping Pong Orchestra
\Geography class uses a medley of characteristic instruments and sounds of world nations*
★ Cliques & Boss fights
·Vendetta Non-Clique: Ode To Billie Joe - Lou Donaldson
·Vendetta Bullies: Skin Therapy - Mr. Dibbs, And on the Sixth Day - Pat Williams
·Vendetta Nerds/Stronghold Assault (Nerd Boss Fight): Casio VL-1 Tone (Sampler), Da Da Da - Trio (not only the song but the nerds cliques itself looks heavy inspired by the movie Revenge of the Nerds, some themes would also fit for Nerds in particular "Burning Down The House by Talking Heads")
·Vendetta Preppies: Billie Jean - Michael Jackson, Whip it - Devo
·Vendetta Greasers: Play For Today - The Cure, Private Idaho - B-52's, Disorder - Joy Division
·Vendetta Jocks: Amen, Brother - The Winstons, Drums Away - The Simon Song (Drums Intro), The Assembly Line - Commodores (this one use one of the most famous samples in music the "Amen Break" by Winstons as initially mentioned)
·Vendetta Dropouts/Townie Challenge: Tédio - Biquíni Cavadão, I Love Rock 'N Roll - The Arrows (Original Composers) *the guitar riff and bass pattern is extremely similar to "Pretty Fly by Offspring" but the song "Tédio" is alot older and still more accurate to the townies theme
·Russell in the Hole: Firestarter (Drum Patterns) - Prodigy, Devotion (Voice of Paradise) - Ten City
·Dishonorable Fight: Eye of the Tiger, Burning Heart - both by Survivor
·Fighting Johnny Vincent: Boogie Woodie - The Beach Boys, Caldonia Boogie - Louis Jordan (also covered by James Brown) *this song line is also referred as "The Walking Bass" featured in many Classic Rock songs
·The Big Game (Jock Boss Fight): Just Like Heaven, A Forest - The Cure, Harmonia - Dino
·Showdown at the Plant: Headhunter - Front 242, Are You Red..Y - The Clash
·Final Showdown: Underwater March - Klaus Badelt, 2001 NBA Ultimate Player (Film Score) *God of War (2018) Game also has a similar tone in "Spartan Rage" overture by Bear McCreary
★... Uncertain? ...Suggestions
·Bully Main Theme (Running Theme): Maniac - Michael Sembello, the synthesizer effect looks an interpolation of the xylophone effect used in the game.
·Overworld (Walking Theme) - The Phantom of the Opera Motion Picture Overture (this also resambles "echoes" by pink floyd but that peculiar melody is more predominant in this theme), Let's Ge Started (Bass Only) - Black Eyed Peas, it looks heavily inspired by Dario Argento movies (as the overall soundtrack).
·Here's to you Ms. Philips/Last Minute Shopping/Cook's Crush/Discretion Assured/Finding Johnny Vincent/Revenge on Mr. Burton "Part 1" (The Search): Sounds similar to "Tenant - Siouxsie And The Banshees", people often confuse this theme to "Cheating Time" but the track is named "Here's to you Ms. Philips" as does the mission, it also resembles a Giorgio Gaslini piece an italian jazz pianist or the american compositor Henry Mancini the creator of Pink Panther iconic theme.
·Panty Raid/Galloway Away/Cheating Time (Stealth): Love Theme From "The Godfather" or "Speak Softly, Love" or just The Godfather Theme from Nino Rota a renowned italian composer, written by Larry Kusik, also resembles the song "Hey by Pixies".
·Comic Klepto: Where’d You Go - Fort Minor e Jonah Matranga (interpolation), also resembles Gramatik, Transplants, Flobots or X-Ecutiornes style of song.
·Funhouse Fun/ Funhouse (Ambience): Carnival of the Animals; Introduction and Royal March of the Lion ("Marche Royale du Lions") - Camille Saint-Saëns (interpolation)
·Funhouse Graveyard "Carnival Funhouse Graveyard" (Unused/Beta): Lux Aeterna - Clint Mansell & Kronos Quartet; Requiem For A Killer Movie Score
·Shop Class "Auto Repair Shop": Sounds similar to Star Guitar - Chemical Brothers, Cities in the Dust - Siouxie And The Banshees
·Math Class (Beta): Sounds similar to Nightmare on Elm Street Theme
·Gym Class/Lockpicking/Jocks Challenge: Sounds similar to "Resucitó" an old catholic song
·Bike Shop "Shiny Bikes": Sounds similar to Billy Club - Junkie XL, Horndog - Overseer
·Greaser's Hideout/Greaser's Challenge "Blue Balls Pool House" "Tattoo Parlor" & "The Happy Mullet": Sounds similar to In-Cut Overdrive - Tomonori Sawada; Sega Rally 2006 Game
·Townies/Dropouts Hideout "Dropout Hangout": Sounds similar to Babel - Covenant
★ Still Missing... Unknown?
·Chemistry Class: although i can't find a matching song it doesn't sound like music per se
·Math Class (Main): definitely a funky/soul tune, unfortunately i couldn't find a corresponding song for it
·Nut Shots: resembles Gradius songs a game by Konami or AiAce Combat a Namco Game
I REALLY LOVE BUNNIES, THEY'RE SO NICE!
I Hope you like it 😎👍
submitted by igorcarbex16 to bully [link] [comments]
https://preview.redd.it/ahl29u0mu73b1.jpg?width=453&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0d37661c842a119f0ed83740ec3eebdaf7b35e47
Hello Bully it's me again, The Bully soundtrack composed by the genius Shawn Lee is pretty rad, so as a music enthusiastic, i want to share this post for people really obsessed with the Bully songs like me, tried to include every song in the game like as puzzle pieces getting together with the greatest amount, most accurate and similar as possible in one sitting, with some help around the internet, personal discoveries and songs already mentioned for yourselves so thank you nonetheless, and sorry for the repetition. Unfortunately some will still be missing so "a little help"/hits for these unreferenced sounds are very welcome.
Some songs are pretty obvious but others looks well hidden, but that's the fun of it, not every song is a sample, they just sound alike or has interpolations.
I know it would be boring to reading all of this so also dedicated this YouTube playlist in details for, so that you can check thoroughly for a more accurate comparison: 😎👍 - Have Fun! https://m.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLtZ1VivcLOsiTtYHUrK-xw8OHZZAeOzRf
★ Main Storyline
·Welcome to Bullworth (Menu theme): Suspiria Theme - Goblin
·This Is Your School: The Duck - Shawn Lee
·The Setup/Bait/The Gym is Burning: Organ Donor - DJ Shadow
·Slingshot/Revenge on Mr. Burton "Part 3" (Fun): My Sweet Lord - George Harrionson the ex-Beatles & Bill Preston
·Save Algie: Love My Way - Psychedelic Furs
·Defend Bucky/The Eggs/Weed KilleStronghold Assault (Action): Shake, Shake, Shake - KC & The Sunshine Band, A Little Less Conversation - Elvis Presley, Hocus Pocus - Focus
·That B****/The Diary/Jealous Johnny/Paparazzi: This Must Be The Place (Naive Melody) - Talking Heads
·The Candidate/Cook's Date: Oh Yeah - Yello
·Halloween/The Big Prank: The Chase - Shawn Lee, Burning Bridges - The Republic From The Getaway Game - Shawn Lee
·Help Gary: Cannonball - Breeders (it also reminds me the "X-Files Theme - Mark Snow" but this is overthinking)
·Character Sheets: Agent Woodrow - The Woodies
·Hattrick vs. Galloway: Cat Blues - Seatbelts (Drum Patterns)
·Movie Tickets (Sneaking On A Date): All Mine, Glory Box - both by Portished
·Carnival Date (Romance): Kiss The Sky - Shawn Lee's Ping Pong Orchestra (also features in "Tales from the Bordelands Episode 2")
·Prep Challenge/Boxing Challenge: Drums on Phasing - Joe Ufer (Sample)
·Race the Vale/Lola's Race: Casio VL-1 Tone (Sampler) *a lot of songs use this instrument for samples, for Bully this is predominant in bike races, it also reminds the iconic song "Funkytown - Lipps inc."
·Beach Rumble: Tenebre 12 mix - Claudio Simonetti
·Tad's House: Billie Jean (Bass Only) - Michael Jackson
·Tagging/Making a Mark (Wildstyle): Chic - Good Times
·Wrong Part of Town/Busting In, Part I: Prog Punk, Psyche Drums (*After The Release!) - Shawn Lee's Ping Pong Orchestra
·The Tenements/Norton Boss Fight: Human Fly - Cramps, I Wanna Be Your Dog - Iggy Pop & the Stooges
·The Rumble/Defender of the Castle (Epic Confrontation): Matador - X Mal Deutschland (as the "wildstyle" music many songs are similar to this, i listed the most accurate or the most fun imo, at least)
·Nerd Challenge/Consumo Arcade (Menu): Sakura, Sakura - Traditional Japanese Folk Song
·Nerd Challenge/Consumo (Main): Four Thousand Years of Chinese History - SNK Sound Team from Fatal Fury: King of Fighters Game
·Glass House/Smash It Up (Destruction/Vandalism): Rapture - Blondie, The Breaks - Kurtis Blow
·Nice Outfit: Odetta - Hit or Miss (Drum Patterns), Dig Your Own Hole - Chemical Brothers (Drum Patterns)
·The Big Game (Nerds "Agent")/Revenge on Mr. Burton "Part 2": Big Bad Wolf - Shawn Lee
·Rats in the Library: You Rock My World - Michael Jackson, Spies In The Wires - Cabaret Voltaire
·Preppies Vandalized (Punishment): D12 40 Oz. - Mr. Stan
·Busting In, Part II/Paper Route: Identity - X-Ray Spec, Mongoloid - Devo
·Showdown at the Plant (Overture): "Saracens Theme" - The Warriors Game
·Complete Mayhem (Street Fight): Criminal - Fiona Apple (also resembles "All Caps - Madvillain-Madvillainy or MF Doom" and "Intermezzo 2 - Mr. chop" but this was released in 2009)
·School's Out (End Credits): Walk On The Wild Side (Bass and Rhythm Pattern) - Lou Reed by Velvet Underground
\Christmas is Here, Small Offences, Discreet Deliveries, The Collector, Mailbox Armageddon and Go See The Principal doesn't feature a unique theme or has any song.*
★ Miscellaneous, Ambience & Shop themes
·Chase Prefect and Police: The Shaft intro and end themes - Isaac Hayes, Beat Dis (12 Version) - Bomb The Bass
·Chase Adults/A Little Help: Take California - Propellerheads, Secret Agent - Bjorn Lynne
·Detention/Mowing Laws - Unused track from The Warrior Game (it doesn't have an actual name, sorry)
·Bike Race 1: Casio VL-1 Tone (Sampler)
·Bike Race 2: Sonic CD Game - Wacky Workbench Zone - Bad Future
·Kart Race (Main) or "Lowrider": You Baby - The Turtles
·Kart Race (Beta): Baba Hya - Lafayette Afro Rock Band
·General Store "Yum Yum Market": Cover Girl - Gabriele Ducros
·Hair Saloon (Poor) "The Final Cut": Punky Dragster - Tele Music
·Hair Saloon (Rich) "Old Bullworth Vale": Dance Feeling - Tele Music
·Clothing Store (Poor) "Worn In Used Clothing": Disco Revisited - Tele Music
·Clothing Store (Rich) "Aquaberry Outlet" (*After The Release!): Now That Is Jazz - Charlie's Bistro Ensemble
·Janitor's Room: Lonesome Heart Swing - Dennis Caplinger
·Carnival Ambience "Billy Crane's Traveling Carnival": Golden Brown - Stranglers
·Box Club Ambience "Glass Jaw Boxing Club": Icy Nation - Tele Music
·Preppie's Hideout Beach "Lighthouse" (*After The Release!): With My Maker I Am One - Chill Coffehouse Drip
·Dragon's Wing Comic Store (*After The Release!): Daniel Loves Singing - C. Allocco
·Nerd's Hideout "Dragon's Wing Comic Store" (Under): Soaring Song - Tele Music
·Jock's Hideout "Jock's Clubhouse": Grand Theft Auto (Song) - Craig Conner
·Monkey Fling (Menu): it reresemble Super Mario World Overworld theme
·Future Street Racer (Main): The Doom - Shadow The Hedgehog 2005 Game
★ Xmas Themes
Holiday themes features various artists, this list is based on the ones made by Shawn lee itself for his album "A Very Ping Pong Christmas: Funky Treats form Santa's Bag", The original composers is on the song description.
·Balls of Snow: Carol of the Bells - Mykola Leontovych
·Miracle on Bullworth St.: Jingle Bells - James Lord Pierpont
·Rudy the Red Nosed Santa: O Come All Ye Faithful (Adeste Fideles) - John Francis Wade & Frederick Oakeley
·Nutcrackin': Deck The Halls - Thomas Oliphant, Little Dummer Boy - Katherine Kennicott Davis, Harry Simeone & Henry Onorati
·Bike Shop (Xmas) "Shiny Bikes": Let it Snow! - Gary Hoey (Dean Martin is the original composer) (Most famous by Frank Sinatra)
·Clothing Store (Poor) (Xmas) "Worn In"/Clothing Store (Rich) (Xmas) "Aquaberry": Jingle Bells (Dan The Automator) - Dean Martin, *the Aquaberry outlet uses a different tone in jazz
·Janitor's Room (Xmas)/Hair Saloon (Poor)(Xmas) "The Final Cut": Up On The House Top (Ho, Ho, Ho) - Gene Autry
·Dragon's Wing Comic Store (Xmas)/Hair Saloon (Rich)(Xmas)"Old Bullworth Vale": We Wish You a Merry Christmas - Traditional English (Britain) Folk Song
·Xmas Tree: Dance Of The Sugar-Plum Fairy - Piotr Ilitch Tchaikovski
\The General Store "Yum Yum Market" reuses a song collage of various themes as Deck the Halls, We Wish You a Merry Christmas and Jingle Bells in that order on looping.*
★ Classes
·Music classes features American Folk and American March Songs since the game takes place in USA
Class 1: Turkey In The Straw
Class 2: Masterpiece Fanfare
Class 3: She'll Be Coming 'Round the Mountain
Class 4: Liberty Bell March (also known as "Monty Python Theme")
Class 5: The Washington Post March (also sounds similar to "Willian Tell Act" by Charlie Chaplin)
·English Class: Piéces de Clavecin en concert; La Timide - Jean-Philippe Rameau
·Art Class: Come With the Night (Drum Patterns) - Sugar Stick (also resembles "Test Area - Broadcast" or "Serpent Magique - Tangerine Dream")
·Photography Class/BMX Park (*After The Release!): Automatic - Shawn Lee & AM (for observation, the Bike Park and Photography theme are slightly different, not the same)
·Biology: Dara Factor One - Weather Report Music, Heist in Helsinki (*After The Release!) - Shawn Lee's Ping Pong Orchestra
\Geography class uses a medley of characteristic instruments and sounds of world nations*
★ Cliques & Boss fights
·Vendetta Non-Clique: Ode To Billie Joe - Lou Donaldson
·Vendetta Bullies: Skin Therapy - Mr. Dibbs, And on the Sixth Day - Pat Williams
·Vendetta Nerds/Stronghold Assault (Nerd Boss Fight): Casio VL-1 Tone (Sampler), Da Da Da - Trio (not only the song but the nerds cliques itself looks heavy inspired by the movie Revenge of the Nerds, some themes would also fit for Nerds in particular "Burning Down The House by Talking Heads")
·Vendetta Preppies: Billie Jean - Michael Jackson, Whip it - Devo
·Vendetta Greasers: Play For Today - The Cure, Private Idaho - B-52's, Disorder - Joy Division
·Vendetta Jocks: Amen, Brother - The Winstons, Drums Away - The Simon Song (Drums Intro), The Assembly Line - Commodores (this one use one of the most famous samples in music the "Amen Break" by Winstons as initially mentioned)
·Vendetta Dropouts/Townie Challenge: Tédio - Biquíni Cavadão, I Love Rock 'N Roll - The Arrows (Original Composers) *the guitar riff and bass pattern is extremely similar to "Pretty Fly by Offspring" but the song "Tédio" is alot older and still more accurate to the townies theme
·Russell in the Hole: Firestarter (Drum Patterns) - Prodigy, Devotion (Voice of Paradise) - Ten City
·Dishonorable Fight: Eye of the Tiger, Burning Heart - both by Survivor
·Fighting Johnny Vincent: Boogie Woodie - The Beach Boys, Caldonia Boogie - Louis Jordan (also covered by James Brown) *this song line is also referred as "The Walking Bass" featured in many Classic Rock songs
·The Big Game (Jock Boss Fight): Just Like Heaven, A Forest - The Cure, Harmonia - Dino
·Showdown at the Plant: Headhunter - Front 242, Are You Red..Y - The Clash
·Final Showdown: Underwater March - Klaus Badelt, 2001 NBA Ultimate Player (Film Score) *God of War (2018) Game also has a similar tone in "Spartan Rage" overture by Bear McCreary
★... Uncertain? ...Suggestions
·Bully Main Theme (Running Theme): Maniac - Michael Sembello, the synthesizer effect looks an interpolation of the xylophone effect used in the game.
·Overworld (Walking Theme) - The Phantom of the Opera Motion Picture Overture (this also resambles "echoes" by pink floyd but that peculiar melody is more predominant in this theme), Let's Ge Started (Bass Only) - Black Eyed Peas, it looks heavily inspired by Dario Argento movies (as the overall soundtrack).
·Here's to you Ms. Philips/Last Minute Shopping/Cook's Crush/Discretion Assured/Finding Johnny Vincent/Revenge on Mr. Burton "Part 1" (The Search): Sounds similar to "Tenant - Siouxsie And The Banshees", people often confuse this theme to "Cheating Time" but the track is named "Here's to you Ms. Philips" as does the mission, it also resembles a Giorgio Gaslini piece an italian jazz pianist or the american compositor Henry Mancini the creator of Pink Panther iconic theme.
·Panty Raid/Galloway Away/Cheating Time (Stealth): Love Theme From "The Godfather" or "Speak Softly, Love" or just The Godfather Theme from Nino Rota a renowned italian composer, written by Larry Kusik, also resembles the song "Hey by Pixies".
·Comic Klepto: Where’d You Go - Fort Minor e Jonah Matranga (interpolation), also resembles Gramatik, Transplants, Flobots or X-Ecutiornes style of song.
·Funhouse Fun/ Funhouse (Ambience): Carnival of the Animals; Introduction and Royal March of the Lion ("Marche Royale du Lions") - Camille Saint-Saëns (interpolation)
·Funhouse Graveyard "Carnival Funhouse Graveyard" (Unused/Beta): Lux Aeterna - Clint Mansell & Kronos Quartet; Requiem For A Killer Movie Score
·Shop Class "Auto Repair Shop": Sounds similar to Star Guitar - Chemical Brothers, Cities in the Dust - Siouxie And The Banshees
·Math Class (Beta): Sounds similar to Nightmare on Elm Street Theme
·Gym Class/Lockpicking/Jocks Challenge: Sounds similar to "Resucitó" an old catholic song
·Bike Shop "Shiny Bikes": Sounds similar to Billy Club - Junkie XL, Horndog - Overseer
·Greaser's Hideout/Greaser's Challenge "Blue Balls Pool House" "Tattoo Parlor" & "The Happy Mullet": Sounds similar to In-Cut Overdrive - Tomonori Sawada; Sega Rally 2006 Game
·Townies/Dropouts Hideout "Dropout Hangout": Sounds similar to Babel - Covenant
★ Still Missing... Unknown?
·Chemistry Class: although i can't find a matching song it doesn't sound like music per se
·Math Class (Main): definitely a funky/soul tune, unfortunately i couldn't find a corresponding song for it
·Nut Shots: resembles Gradius songs a game by Konami or AiAce Combat a Namco Game
I REALLY LOVE BUNNIES, THEY'RE SO NICE!
I Hope you like it 😎👍
2023.05.31 16:10 chuckhustmyre [TH] 100 CEMETERY (Part Two of Two) by Chuck Hustmyre
When the old man got within range, John kicked at him with his good leg, but the old timer was quick, much quicker than he looked. He ducked to his right, side stepping John's lashing foot, then darted in and touched the tip of the prod to John's leg. Fire--that's what it felt like. White hot fire. A jolt went through John's body that made his eyeballs hurt. And just like that, the old man slipped in again and jabbed him in the stomach. Then, as John rolled onto his belly, the tip touched his back.
John curled into a ball and hugged his knees to his chest.
"Get through that door, boy," the old man said. "Move it, now!" Like herding an ornery animal.
And like an animal, John Burke responded, lifting himself onto all fours and crawling toward the exit. Halfway across the floor, the old man jammed the cattle prod against John's ass. He cried out and scampered through the door.
As soon they were out of the room, the old man clicked his cheek a couple of times like he was calling a dog. "Get on your feet, like a good boy." John struggled to his feet as the door closed behind him and the bolts slammed into place. He stood at one end of a narrow passage, dark, except for a single bulb hanging from the ceiling at the far end. Again, John felt the prod touch his back.
"Get!" the old man said.
John limped toward the light.
The passage emptied into a windowless room, low ceilinged and big. The old man forced him into a chute--a cattle chute. Horizontal steel poles on each side formed a walkway barely wide enough for a man's shoulders. The poles were stacked four high, the top pole about five feet off the ground. Every six or eight feet stood a vertical brace.
The old man closed and locked a sliding wooden door behind them, then bent and slipped between two of the horizontal poles. Outside the chute, he prodded John to keep him moving. As John walked toward the end, the old man thumped him two or three times with the prod but didn't shock him.
Suddenly, an overpowering stench hit John and his feet stopped moving. He looked to the right, toward the source of the smell, and saw a stainless steel table, on top of which lay a man's lifeless body. He was on his belly with his head turned and John could see the face of the man who'd been goaded out of the room just before him. The white-haired old lady stood beside the table gripping an electric carving knife in one latexed hand, while with her other gloved hand she pressed the man's leg firmly against the table. Bile gurgled up into John's throat as the old lady thumbed the switch on the carving knife and sliced a hunk of meat from the back of the dead man's thigh.
John spewed vomit and dropped to his knees. "Get up, boy," he heard from behind him as the prod juiced his lower back. John screamed in pain as he staggered to his feet. "Move it," the old man said. With legs like jelly, John stumbled forward.
The cut he'd worked into the leather belt was just to the right of the steel loop through which the handcuffs ran. Only an eighth of an inch of leather remained. Using his body, John shielded his hands from the old man's view while he tugged on the handcuffs and hobbled along.
The sides of the chute closed in on him as he reached the end. Near panic, John tried to turn around, but before he could the old man slid a gate closed behind him that penned him in.
Trapped.
From the corner of his eye, John watched the old man. Saw him step towards a workbench against the wall, fifteen feet away, and toss the cattle prod onto it. He pulled a ballpeen hammer down from a wall above the bench. It had a big stainless steel head with a foot long wooden handle. The old man turned and walked toward John with a casual, bored look on his face, just another day in the slaughterhouse.
Bent as far forward as he could, John thrust his hips back and jerked his cuffed hands forward, but the leather belt held. Behind him he heard the old man's shoes scrape the cement floor. Desperate, John twisted his hands to the right. The leather still held. Just an eighth of an inch between a chance for escape and a hammer to the back of the head.
A shoe scuff on the floor. Afraid to look, John stared at his hands. He groaned as he thrust his hips to the right and jerked his hands to the left. The leather tore and the belt pulled free from his waist.
"Where you think you're going?" the old man said.
John ducked and heard the top pole ring as the ballpeen hammer glanced off of it. With the belt still dangling from his handcuffs, John doubled over and stepped between the two middle poles on his left side. To his right the old man cursed him and swung the hammer between the bars. The hammer thumped into John's right hip but he didn't stop. Once through the bars he ran--hobbled on his painful ankle--toward the wall, trying to put as much distance between him and the old man as possible.
"Momma, momma, he got loose!"
"Catch him quick 'fore he gets away," the old lady screamed.
John Burke was lost. He didn't know where he was our how to get out. He turned, saw the old man race around the end of the chute, hammer cocked over his shoulder. John's back was to the wall. Wildly, he glanced around for something he could use. There was nothing.
To his left, twenty feet away was the corner of the room and a closed door.
The old man saw John looking. "You'll never get out." But he slowed down, approaching cautiously, angling toward the door to cut off John's only escape route.
The old man looked nervous about the door. John broke and ran. Waves of pain shot up his leg from his swollen ankle but he ignored it. The old man lunged toward the door to intercept. John tried to stop and start, throw a fake at the old man, but his ankle folded and he hit the floor.
The old man dropped to one knee beside him and raised the hammer over his head. "Got you!"
But as the killer blow came down, John shifted slightly to the side and the hammer struck the cement beside his head, sending tiny chips flying into his face. He lashed out with his good foot, missed the old man's head but caught him in the ribs. As the old man grunted and toppled over, John got to his feet and struggled to the door.
Locked.
John twisted the knob and screamed in rage. The old man stood up. Mounted on the wall next to the door was a gray metal circuit box, the handle protruding from its side angled up in the on position. An electrical shut off.
"Get him, poppy," the old woman screamed from the other side of the room. A nice old couple who called each other momma and poppy.
John grabbed the handle with both hands, shot a glance at the old man, saw him bearing down, and pulled.
Lights out. Total darkness.
Just in time John ducked. He heard the old man grunt as the hammer dug into the drywall. With his manacled hands, John shoved the old man, then ran along the wall to his left. Moving through the dark it felt like a mile. The old lady screamed.
Cuffed hands out in front with the torn leather belt dangling from them, John ran into the wall and turned right. He had no idea where to go or what to do. Just knew he had to put as much distance as he could between him and the old man. At the next corner he turned right again. Just up ahead he heard the old lady. "Poppy, I can't see."
He slowed down, tried to catch his breath. Then the lights came on. Poppy must have gotten to the switch. John found himself next to the stainless steel butchering table, and face-to-face with the old lady. With the power on, her electric carving knife started buzzing.
"I got him, poppy!" she said and chopped at him with the knife.
John jerked his head back as the humming blade passed less than an inch from his eyes.
"Momma!" the old man screamed.
John looked across the big room at the old man by the door. Hammer swinging from his hand, he started to run towards them but had to go around the cattle chute. The old lady again cut at John but this time he managed to catch her wrist in his hands. As he kicked her in the shin he heard one of his bare toes crack, but she loosened her grip on the knife and he was able to jerk it out of her hand.
The old man rounded the end of the chute and howled in rage as he saw them struggling. Momma clawed at John's eyes with both hands, but he managed to close them just as her nails raked his face. Carving knife in hand, he slashed at the old lady. The vibrating blade ripped into the side of her neck and cut across her throat. She gurgled up a foul smelling blast of air from her open trachea that made John gag. With her eyes wide open, the old lady looked stunned as her knees folded and she collapsed to the ground.
John Burke turned and the old man was right on top of him, screaming, swinging the hammer at his head. As John raised the carving knife, the hammer snapped the blade off and knocked it from his hand. The old man lunged closer, grabbed him by the throat with his left hand and raised the hammer again.
John threw an awkward jab with his shackled hands and hit the old man in the face with just enough force to stun him into losing his grip on John's neck. Then with a two-handed uppercut to the gut, this one with a little more behind it, he doubled the old man over, then ran for the door.
Standing in front of the door, he jerked down the power switch and again shrouded the room in darkness. He raised his good leg and kicked the wooden door as hard as he could. It gave just a little. Behind him he heard the old man crying, and something else--things being knocked over, things hitting the floor, the sounds of searching.
As John kicked again, his bad ankle screamed in pain, yet still the door held. He caught his breath, raised his good leg and managed one more kick. This time the knob splintered off and the door flew open. Stairs led up.
Behind him, a two-count metallic click echoed through the room. The unmistakable sound of a shell being chambered. A shotgun.
Fighting back the pain, John loped up the stairs as the shotgun blasted behind him. Upstairs he found himself in an empty kitchen. He moved down a short hallway that opened into a room he recognized, the den of the old lady's house. It was dark outside and only a few lights were on inside the house.
Footsteps on the cellar stairs.
Frantically, John looked around, seeing the big bay windows, but no door to the outside. He knocked the dead telephone to the ground, snatched up the end table, and heaved it through one of the windows.
Outside the air was warm and muggy, the ground soft like after a rain. Naked, except for the handcuffs and leather belt hanging from them, John staggered toward the woods just beyond the house. As he reached the first trees he heard another shotgun blast behind him, heard glass shatter, heard pellets tearing through the trees to his right.
Into the trees, getting some of them between him and the house in case the old man ripped off another shot.
"Murderer! I'll kill you," the old timer yelled through the trees. Almost funny, a minute ago the old man trying to bash his brains in with a hammer but still had the nerve to call him a murderer. Not to mention the sweet old lady carving a man like a Christmas turkey.
John turned forty-five degrees to the right. Choosing a zig-zag over a straight line. A minute later he heard another shot, then the pellets ripped into the branches off to his left. A frustration shot. The old man had guessed he'd turn but he'd guessed the wrong way.
He'd gotten out of shape. Just a few minutes into the woods he was puffing like a steam train, a stitch like a knife twisting into his side. John could feel his ankle starting to swell. Time for the zag so he turned left, crossed through what he guessed was fifty or sixty yards of woods, then suddenly burst into a clearing--the cemetery. The high three-quarter moon cast short, dark shadows from the tombstones. Blackness in a sea of night.
Something crashed through the brush behind him in the distance, followed by bark of a big dog. John had trouble as he stepped over the low spiked fence that surrounded the graveyard. For a second he had to put all of his weight on his bad leg and came close to impaling himself.
John remembered another fence, a six-foot iron one that spanned the front of the property, the half-inch thick bars thrust at the sky like black spears. If it circled the whole property, how the hell was he going to get out?
The barking grew louder.
As he limped between the gravestones, John heard the old man cursing in the distance, farther away than the dog, but getting closer. Terror's icy hand gripped John Burke's heart. His feet stopped moving and he dropped down onto a soft, moist patch of earth and leaned his back against a marble slab that marked someone's final resting place, someone whose troubles were over for good. John put his head into his hands as despair washed over him.
He wasn't going to get away. Not on a bad ankle. Not with his hands cuffed. Not from a madman with a dog and shotgun. A madman who kept humans like cattle, who beat men to death with a hammer, whose wife ran a human butcher shop. They were close, the old man and his dog. John could hear the dog tearing through the underbrush just inside the woods, just beyond the cemetery fence. In a minute it would all be over. He wondered if Gail would ever find out what happened to him? To die like this, in a bone yard, victim to a crazy old man and his even crazier wife.
Fear, despair, hopelessness--these feelings surged through John as a sob racked his body so hard it bounced his back off the marble tombstone and shot a bolt of pain down his spine. Then, as if cleansed by fire, those feelings melted like snow, replaced by something new, by something better, by something that fueled him--Rage.
Perched in front of the grave next to him was a thick marble urn, holding a bouquet of long dead flowers. John rolled to it, grabbed the urn in both hands, and dumped out the withered flora. He felt the comforting weight of the urn, heavy enough to crush a dog's skull, or a man's.
He wasn't going to make it easy. If they were going to kill him, they'd have to work for it. The headstones were too small to hide behind unless he crouched down and John didn't want to crouch down and hide. He was through hiding, besides, his ankle couldn't take much crouching. Better to let the dog see him, try to get rid of the mutt before the old man made it out of the woods.
The underbrush got quiet. The dog was out of the woods. No more barking. The moonlight and the shadows played tricks on John's eyes. A glimpse of movement at the fence then nothing. He strained his eyes, willing them to see through the darkness but it was his ears that responded, picking up the quick thumping of padded feet on the wet grass. The sound coming from his left. John raised the urn and turned, then heard it behind him, much closer. A throaty growl. He tried to spin around but the furry beast hit him in the back.
Claws raked his bare shoulder blades as he slammed face first into the ground and the marble urn flew from his hands, useless. Sharp teeth gripped the back of his head and shook it like the stuffed head of a doll. His scalp tore--he actually felt it--as the dog growled and bit harder.
"Get him, boy!" the old man shouted from somewhere near the edge of the woods.
John used his good left leg to push into the ground and roll. The dog tightened its grip on John's head and tried to roll with him but John used his arms to topple the German Shepherd off of him. As the brute tried to regain his feet, John kept rolling until he was on top with the dog pinned under him. The canine's jaws sprung open, looking for something to bite as John grabbed the animal's big head, one hand on each side, and forced the handcuff chain and part of the leather belt into the back of its mouth.
With his naked body pressing down on the dog, John forced the Shepherd's head back. The handcuff chain cut into the roof of the dog's mouth as John pushed back harder and harder. The beast's nails ripped at John's chest and thighs, but still he forced the big head back until the dog's agonized yelping was cut short by a loud crack, like the dry snap of a rotten branch, as its neck broke and body went limp.
John rolled off of the dead dog and struggled to his feet. The old man yelled, "Did you get him, Butch? Did you get him?" John turned toward the sound of the man's voice and saw him stumble out of the woods, just on the other side of the fence, shotgun held across his chest. The old man's eyes locked on the animal lying on the ground. "Butch!" he cried, voice cracked with emotion Then he raised his shotgun.
John dropped behind a headstone just as a blast ripped through the air. Pellets smacked into the other side of the stone. Then, as the double click of a new shell being racked into the chamber echoed across the graveyard, John scrambled away on all fours, keeping his head below the top of the tombstones.
By the time he reached the cemetery fence, John could barely move. His breath came in ragged gasps; his chest, shoulders, and thighs were on fire; and the back of his neck felt wet and sticky. He lifted his cuffed hands over his head and wiped at his neck. His palms came away covered with blood, blood that looked almost black in the moonlight.
One foot got tangled going over the fence and John fell, landing with a thud on the other side. Behind him, fifty yards at most, he could hear the old man's quick shuffle coming across the cemetery. The old man mumbling and cursing to himself. Once John got into the tree line he felt a little safer, something between him and muzzle of that shotgun. But the going was slow. Much tougher than before. He started to feel dizzy. The dog had torn him up and he knew he was bleeding badly.
He'd made it this far but knew there was no way he could make it all the way back home, at least not tonight. Too tired and too hurt. But with the dog dead, all he had to do was shake the old man off his trail, then hole up somewhere until daylight. In the morning he would parallel the road just inside the trees to keep out of sight. His house was only two miles away. He would make it even if he had to crawl on his hands and knees the whole way.
He ran into the fence. Six feet tall, made of pointed wrought iron bars, no more than ten inches apart. Impossible to slip between them. The bars braced by two thin rectangular, iron beams that ran the length of the fence. One, a foot from the ground; the other, a foot from the top.
John hadn't gained any distance on the old man. He could hear his thrashing back in the trees, his slow, steady pace, his mumbling punctuated by curses.
There was only one way to get out and that was over the fence. John set his feet on the bottom support and grabbed the top crossbar with both hands, but with his wrists cuffed he couldn't spread his hands out. He couldn't climb.
He managed to pull himself up so his chin was over the top of the fence and then swung his good leg up. It didn't go high enough. Arms straining, he swung it up harder and managed to hook his heel on the top support, between two of the bars. That's when he lost his grip.
John fell but his foot stayed. He heard his ankle crack and he screamed. Caught between the two vertical bars and the horizontal support, his bare foot was wedged in tight and he hung upside down, naked, like a stuck pig being bled in a slaughterhouse.
The old man stepped out from the trees, shotgun held across his chest like a soldier. Fifteen feet from John, he raised it to his shoulder and grinned as he pulled the trigger. CLICK.
"Goddamit!" He racked the pump, took aim, and pulled the trigger again. Another empty click. This time he slammed the pump back and stared into the open chamber. "Son of a bitch," he mumbled, then grabbed the barrel in a two handed grip.
He swung it like a baseball bat at John's head and all John Burke could do was close his eyes. Just before the wooden stock crashed into his skull, he heard himself say, "Gail."
* * *
Gail Burke was on the toilet, in the middle of peeing, when the doorbell rang. "John," she heard herself say. "God, please let it be John." She pulled on her jeans and ran to the door, didn't even flush. But it wasn't John. It was a man, old but distinguished looking in a dark suit with a pale blue tie draped in front of a starched white shirt. She glanced behind him and saw a van parked in her driveway. Not a minivan, but a full-sized, white work van, windowless except for the driver and passenger doors. No name on the side.
"Can I help you?" she asked, losing hope her caller had anything to do with John.
He raised his hands slightly and she noticed they held a round plastic container. Rubbermaid, or Tupperware, with a lid on it. "Yes," she said.
"Mrs. Burke?"
Gail nodded.
My name is Muller, Frank Muller. He nodded to the right. "I live on Cemetery Road."
She gave him a brief smile.
"I've read about your...your husband's disappearance in the paper."
At first she'd had a lot of visitors like this. Well-wishers, sympathizers, but it had been two weeks and people had stopped coming by. Mostly, she guessed they thought John's disappearance maybe wasn't so mysterious after all. Middle-aged man, married for a dozen years, suddenly takes off. Maybe found a young girl. No mystery there. But she knew that wasn't what he'd done. Something terrible had happened. She could feel it.
"Thank you," was all she could think of to say.
He raised his hands again. "I've brought you something. Chili, my wife's secret recipe."
She looked at the container. The two-gallon size. That's a lot of chili, she thought. She caught a whiff of it as he slipped one hand under the container and lifted part of the lid with the other. He said, "Chock full of beef and beans. Put some meat on your bones."
Gail felt her face flush. Her jeans hung loosely on her hips. She'd lost ten pounds since John disappeared and hadn't had it to spare to begin with. "Thank you. Thank you very much, Mr..." She couldn't even remember the gentleman's name.
"Muller," he said.
"Of course," she said quickly. "Thank you again, Mr. Muller." Gail reached for the container. "To be honest I haven't felt much like cooking and that smells delicious. Please tell Mrs. Muller that I said--"
Mr. Muller shook his head. "Buried her recently."
"Oh, I'm sorry to hear that."
As she took the chili from him, he forced a smile. "I made it but it's her recipe so if it's good she gets the credit." He laughed a more genuine laugh. "And if it's bad, I'll take the blame."
She felt the heat through the plastic. They said goodbye and Gail Burke went inside to eat a bowl of Mrs. Muller's secret recipe. She felt her stomach growl with hunger. If it tasted as good as it smelled, maybe she'd have two bowls.
THE END
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John curled into a ball and hugged his knees to his chest.
"Get through that door, boy," the old man said. "Move it, now!" Like herding an ornery animal.
And like an animal, John Burke responded, lifting himself onto all fours and crawling toward the exit. Halfway across the floor, the old man jammed the cattle prod against John's ass. He cried out and scampered through the door.
As soon they were out of the room, the old man clicked his cheek a couple of times like he was calling a dog. "Get on your feet, like a good boy." John struggled to his feet as the door closed behind him and the bolts slammed into place. He stood at one end of a narrow passage, dark, except for a single bulb hanging from the ceiling at the far end. Again, John felt the prod touch his back.
"Get!" the old man said.
John limped toward the light.
The passage emptied into a windowless room, low ceilinged and big. The old man forced him into a chute--a cattle chute. Horizontal steel poles on each side formed a walkway barely wide enough for a man's shoulders. The poles were stacked four high, the top pole about five feet off the ground. Every six or eight feet stood a vertical brace.
The old man closed and locked a sliding wooden door behind them, then bent and slipped between two of the horizontal poles. Outside the chute, he prodded John to keep him moving. As John walked toward the end, the old man thumped him two or three times with the prod but didn't shock him.
Suddenly, an overpowering stench hit John and his feet stopped moving. He looked to the right, toward the source of the smell, and saw a stainless steel table, on top of which lay a man's lifeless body. He was on his belly with his head turned and John could see the face of the man who'd been goaded out of the room just before him. The white-haired old lady stood beside the table gripping an electric carving knife in one latexed hand, while with her other gloved hand she pressed the man's leg firmly against the table. Bile gurgled up into John's throat as the old lady thumbed the switch on the carving knife and sliced a hunk of meat from the back of the dead man's thigh.
John spewed vomit and dropped to his knees. "Get up, boy," he heard from behind him as the prod juiced his lower back. John screamed in pain as he staggered to his feet. "Move it," the old man said. With legs like jelly, John stumbled forward.
The cut he'd worked into the leather belt was just to the right of the steel loop through which the handcuffs ran. Only an eighth of an inch of leather remained. Using his body, John shielded his hands from the old man's view while he tugged on the handcuffs and hobbled along.
The sides of the chute closed in on him as he reached the end. Near panic, John tried to turn around, but before he could the old man slid a gate closed behind him that penned him in.
Trapped.
From the corner of his eye, John watched the old man. Saw him step towards a workbench against the wall, fifteen feet away, and toss the cattle prod onto it. He pulled a ballpeen hammer down from a wall above the bench. It had a big stainless steel head with a foot long wooden handle. The old man turned and walked toward John with a casual, bored look on his face, just another day in the slaughterhouse.
Bent as far forward as he could, John thrust his hips back and jerked his cuffed hands forward, but the leather belt held. Behind him he heard the old man's shoes scrape the cement floor. Desperate, John twisted his hands to the right. The leather still held. Just an eighth of an inch between a chance for escape and a hammer to the back of the head.
A shoe scuff on the floor. Afraid to look, John stared at his hands. He groaned as he thrust his hips to the right and jerked his hands to the left. The leather tore and the belt pulled free from his waist.
"Where you think you're going?" the old man said.
John ducked and heard the top pole ring as the ballpeen hammer glanced off of it. With the belt still dangling from his handcuffs, John doubled over and stepped between the two middle poles on his left side. To his right the old man cursed him and swung the hammer between the bars. The hammer thumped into John's right hip but he didn't stop. Once through the bars he ran--hobbled on his painful ankle--toward the wall, trying to put as much distance between him and the old man as possible.
"Momma, momma, he got loose!"
"Catch him quick 'fore he gets away," the old lady screamed.
John Burke was lost. He didn't know where he was our how to get out. He turned, saw the old man race around the end of the chute, hammer cocked over his shoulder. John's back was to the wall. Wildly, he glanced around for something he could use. There was nothing.
To his left, twenty feet away was the corner of the room and a closed door.
The old man saw John looking. "You'll never get out." But he slowed down, approaching cautiously, angling toward the door to cut off John's only escape route.
The old man looked nervous about the door. John broke and ran. Waves of pain shot up his leg from his swollen ankle but he ignored it. The old man lunged toward the door to intercept. John tried to stop and start, throw a fake at the old man, but his ankle folded and he hit the floor.
The old man dropped to one knee beside him and raised the hammer over his head. "Got you!"
But as the killer blow came down, John shifted slightly to the side and the hammer struck the cement beside his head, sending tiny chips flying into his face. He lashed out with his good foot, missed the old man's head but caught him in the ribs. As the old man grunted and toppled over, John got to his feet and struggled to the door.
Locked.
John twisted the knob and screamed in rage. The old man stood up. Mounted on the wall next to the door was a gray metal circuit box, the handle protruding from its side angled up in the on position. An electrical shut off.
"Get him, poppy," the old woman screamed from the other side of the room. A nice old couple who called each other momma and poppy.
John grabbed the handle with both hands, shot a glance at the old man, saw him bearing down, and pulled.
Lights out. Total darkness.
Just in time John ducked. He heard the old man grunt as the hammer dug into the drywall. With his manacled hands, John shoved the old man, then ran along the wall to his left. Moving through the dark it felt like a mile. The old lady screamed.
Cuffed hands out in front with the torn leather belt dangling from them, John ran into the wall and turned right. He had no idea where to go or what to do. Just knew he had to put as much distance as he could between him and the old man. At the next corner he turned right again. Just up ahead he heard the old lady. "Poppy, I can't see."
He slowed down, tried to catch his breath. Then the lights came on. Poppy must have gotten to the switch. John found himself next to the stainless steel butchering table, and face-to-face with the old lady. With the power on, her electric carving knife started buzzing.
"I got him, poppy!" she said and chopped at him with the knife.
John jerked his head back as the humming blade passed less than an inch from his eyes.
"Momma!" the old man screamed.
John looked across the big room at the old man by the door. Hammer swinging from his hand, he started to run towards them but had to go around the cattle chute. The old lady again cut at John but this time he managed to catch her wrist in his hands. As he kicked her in the shin he heard one of his bare toes crack, but she loosened her grip on the knife and he was able to jerk it out of her hand.
The old man rounded the end of the chute and howled in rage as he saw them struggling. Momma clawed at John's eyes with both hands, but he managed to close them just as her nails raked his face. Carving knife in hand, he slashed at the old lady. The vibrating blade ripped into the side of her neck and cut across her throat. She gurgled up a foul smelling blast of air from her open trachea that made John gag. With her eyes wide open, the old lady looked stunned as her knees folded and she collapsed to the ground.
John Burke turned and the old man was right on top of him, screaming, swinging the hammer at his head. As John raised the carving knife, the hammer snapped the blade off and knocked it from his hand. The old man lunged closer, grabbed him by the throat with his left hand and raised the hammer again.
John threw an awkward jab with his shackled hands and hit the old man in the face with just enough force to stun him into losing his grip on John's neck. Then with a two-handed uppercut to the gut, this one with a little more behind it, he doubled the old man over, then ran for the door.
Standing in front of the door, he jerked down the power switch and again shrouded the room in darkness. He raised his good leg and kicked the wooden door as hard as he could. It gave just a little. Behind him he heard the old man crying, and something else--things being knocked over, things hitting the floor, the sounds of searching.
As John kicked again, his bad ankle screamed in pain, yet still the door held. He caught his breath, raised his good leg and managed one more kick. This time the knob splintered off and the door flew open. Stairs led up.
Behind him, a two-count metallic click echoed through the room. The unmistakable sound of a shell being chambered. A shotgun.
Fighting back the pain, John loped up the stairs as the shotgun blasted behind him. Upstairs he found himself in an empty kitchen. He moved down a short hallway that opened into a room he recognized, the den of the old lady's house. It was dark outside and only a few lights were on inside the house.
Footsteps on the cellar stairs.
Frantically, John looked around, seeing the big bay windows, but no door to the outside. He knocked the dead telephone to the ground, snatched up the end table, and heaved it through one of the windows.
Outside the air was warm and muggy, the ground soft like after a rain. Naked, except for the handcuffs and leather belt hanging from them, John staggered toward the woods just beyond the house. As he reached the first trees he heard another shotgun blast behind him, heard glass shatter, heard pellets tearing through the trees to his right.
Into the trees, getting some of them between him and the house in case the old man ripped off another shot.
"Murderer! I'll kill you," the old timer yelled through the trees. Almost funny, a minute ago the old man trying to bash his brains in with a hammer but still had the nerve to call him a murderer. Not to mention the sweet old lady carving a man like a Christmas turkey.
John turned forty-five degrees to the right. Choosing a zig-zag over a straight line. A minute later he heard another shot, then the pellets ripped into the branches off to his left. A frustration shot. The old man had guessed he'd turn but he'd guessed the wrong way.
He'd gotten out of shape. Just a few minutes into the woods he was puffing like a steam train, a stitch like a knife twisting into his side. John could feel his ankle starting to swell. Time for the zag so he turned left, crossed through what he guessed was fifty or sixty yards of woods, then suddenly burst into a clearing--the cemetery. The high three-quarter moon cast short, dark shadows from the tombstones. Blackness in a sea of night.
Something crashed through the brush behind him in the distance, followed by bark of a big dog. John had trouble as he stepped over the low spiked fence that surrounded the graveyard. For a second he had to put all of his weight on his bad leg and came close to impaling himself.
John remembered another fence, a six-foot iron one that spanned the front of the property, the half-inch thick bars thrust at the sky like black spears. If it circled the whole property, how the hell was he going to get out?
The barking grew louder.
As he limped between the gravestones, John heard the old man cursing in the distance, farther away than the dog, but getting closer. Terror's icy hand gripped John Burke's heart. His feet stopped moving and he dropped down onto a soft, moist patch of earth and leaned his back against a marble slab that marked someone's final resting place, someone whose troubles were over for good. John put his head into his hands as despair washed over him.
He wasn't going to get away. Not on a bad ankle. Not with his hands cuffed. Not from a madman with a dog and shotgun. A madman who kept humans like cattle, who beat men to death with a hammer, whose wife ran a human butcher shop. They were close, the old man and his dog. John could hear the dog tearing through the underbrush just inside the woods, just beyond the cemetery fence. In a minute it would all be over. He wondered if Gail would ever find out what happened to him? To die like this, in a bone yard, victim to a crazy old man and his even crazier wife.
Fear, despair, hopelessness--these feelings surged through John as a sob racked his body so hard it bounced his back off the marble tombstone and shot a bolt of pain down his spine. Then, as if cleansed by fire, those feelings melted like snow, replaced by something new, by something better, by something that fueled him--Rage.
Perched in front of the grave next to him was a thick marble urn, holding a bouquet of long dead flowers. John rolled to it, grabbed the urn in both hands, and dumped out the withered flora. He felt the comforting weight of the urn, heavy enough to crush a dog's skull, or a man's.
He wasn't going to make it easy. If they were going to kill him, they'd have to work for it. The headstones were too small to hide behind unless he crouched down and John didn't want to crouch down and hide. He was through hiding, besides, his ankle couldn't take much crouching. Better to let the dog see him, try to get rid of the mutt before the old man made it out of the woods.
The underbrush got quiet. The dog was out of the woods. No more barking. The moonlight and the shadows played tricks on John's eyes. A glimpse of movement at the fence then nothing. He strained his eyes, willing them to see through the darkness but it was his ears that responded, picking up the quick thumping of padded feet on the wet grass. The sound coming from his left. John raised the urn and turned, then heard it behind him, much closer. A throaty growl. He tried to spin around but the furry beast hit him in the back.
Claws raked his bare shoulder blades as he slammed face first into the ground and the marble urn flew from his hands, useless. Sharp teeth gripped the back of his head and shook it like the stuffed head of a doll. His scalp tore--he actually felt it--as the dog growled and bit harder.
"Get him, boy!" the old man shouted from somewhere near the edge of the woods.
John used his good left leg to push into the ground and roll. The dog tightened its grip on John's head and tried to roll with him but John used his arms to topple the German Shepherd off of him. As the brute tried to regain his feet, John kept rolling until he was on top with the dog pinned under him. The canine's jaws sprung open, looking for something to bite as John grabbed the animal's big head, one hand on each side, and forced the handcuff chain and part of the leather belt into the back of its mouth.
With his naked body pressing down on the dog, John forced the Shepherd's head back. The handcuff chain cut into the roof of the dog's mouth as John pushed back harder and harder. The beast's nails ripped at John's chest and thighs, but still he forced the big head back until the dog's agonized yelping was cut short by a loud crack, like the dry snap of a rotten branch, as its neck broke and body went limp.
John rolled off of the dead dog and struggled to his feet. The old man yelled, "Did you get him, Butch? Did you get him?" John turned toward the sound of the man's voice and saw him stumble out of the woods, just on the other side of the fence, shotgun held across his chest. The old man's eyes locked on the animal lying on the ground. "Butch!" he cried, voice cracked with emotion Then he raised his shotgun.
John dropped behind a headstone just as a blast ripped through the air. Pellets smacked into the other side of the stone. Then, as the double click of a new shell being racked into the chamber echoed across the graveyard, John scrambled away on all fours, keeping his head below the top of the tombstones.
By the time he reached the cemetery fence, John could barely move. His breath came in ragged gasps; his chest, shoulders, and thighs were on fire; and the back of his neck felt wet and sticky. He lifted his cuffed hands over his head and wiped at his neck. His palms came away covered with blood, blood that looked almost black in the moonlight.
One foot got tangled going over the fence and John fell, landing with a thud on the other side. Behind him, fifty yards at most, he could hear the old man's quick shuffle coming across the cemetery. The old man mumbling and cursing to himself. Once John got into the tree line he felt a little safer, something between him and muzzle of that shotgun. But the going was slow. Much tougher than before. He started to feel dizzy. The dog had torn him up and he knew he was bleeding badly.
He'd made it this far but knew there was no way he could make it all the way back home, at least not tonight. Too tired and too hurt. But with the dog dead, all he had to do was shake the old man off his trail, then hole up somewhere until daylight. In the morning he would parallel the road just inside the trees to keep out of sight. His house was only two miles away. He would make it even if he had to crawl on his hands and knees the whole way.
He ran into the fence. Six feet tall, made of pointed wrought iron bars, no more than ten inches apart. Impossible to slip between them. The bars braced by two thin rectangular, iron beams that ran the length of the fence. One, a foot from the ground; the other, a foot from the top.
John hadn't gained any distance on the old man. He could hear his thrashing back in the trees, his slow, steady pace, his mumbling punctuated by curses.
There was only one way to get out and that was over the fence. John set his feet on the bottom support and grabbed the top crossbar with both hands, but with his wrists cuffed he couldn't spread his hands out. He couldn't climb.
He managed to pull himself up so his chin was over the top of the fence and then swung his good leg up. It didn't go high enough. Arms straining, he swung it up harder and managed to hook his heel on the top support, between two of the bars. That's when he lost his grip.
John fell but his foot stayed. He heard his ankle crack and he screamed. Caught between the two vertical bars and the horizontal support, his bare foot was wedged in tight and he hung upside down, naked, like a stuck pig being bled in a slaughterhouse.
The old man stepped out from the trees, shotgun held across his chest like a soldier. Fifteen feet from John, he raised it to his shoulder and grinned as he pulled the trigger. CLICK.
"Goddamit!" He racked the pump, took aim, and pulled the trigger again. Another empty click. This time he slammed the pump back and stared into the open chamber. "Son of a bitch," he mumbled, then grabbed the barrel in a two handed grip.
He swung it like a baseball bat at John's head and all John Burke could do was close his eyes. Just before the wooden stock crashed into his skull, he heard himself say, "Gail."
* * *
Gail Burke was on the toilet, in the middle of peeing, when the doorbell rang. "John," she heard herself say. "God, please let it be John." She pulled on her jeans and ran to the door, didn't even flush. But it wasn't John. It was a man, old but distinguished looking in a dark suit with a pale blue tie draped in front of a starched white shirt. She glanced behind him and saw a van parked in her driveway. Not a minivan, but a full-sized, white work van, windowless except for the driver and passenger doors. No name on the side.
"Can I help you?" she asked, losing hope her caller had anything to do with John.
He raised his hands slightly and she noticed they held a round plastic container. Rubbermaid, or Tupperware, with a lid on it. "Yes," she said.
"Mrs. Burke?"
Gail nodded.
My name is Muller, Frank Muller. He nodded to the right. "I live on Cemetery Road."
She gave him a brief smile.
"I've read about your...your husband's disappearance in the paper."
At first she'd had a lot of visitors like this. Well-wishers, sympathizers, but it had been two weeks and people had stopped coming by. Mostly, she guessed they thought John's disappearance maybe wasn't so mysterious after all. Middle-aged man, married for a dozen years, suddenly takes off. Maybe found a young girl. No mystery there. But she knew that wasn't what he'd done. Something terrible had happened. She could feel it.
"Thank you," was all she could think of to say.
He raised his hands again. "I've brought you something. Chili, my wife's secret recipe."
She looked at the container. The two-gallon size. That's a lot of chili, she thought. She caught a whiff of it as he slipped one hand under the container and lifted part of the lid with the other. He said, "Chock full of beef and beans. Put some meat on your bones."
Gail felt her face flush. Her jeans hung loosely on her hips. She'd lost ten pounds since John disappeared and hadn't had it to spare to begin with. "Thank you. Thank you very much, Mr..." She couldn't even remember the gentleman's name.
"Muller," he said.
"Of course," she said quickly. "Thank you again, Mr. Muller." Gail reached for the container. "To be honest I haven't felt much like cooking and that smells delicious. Please tell Mrs. Muller that I said--"
Mr. Muller shook his head. "Buried her recently."
"Oh, I'm sorry to hear that."
As she took the chili from him, he forced a smile. "I made it but it's her recipe so if it's good she gets the credit." He laughed a more genuine laugh. "And if it's bad, I'll take the blame."
She felt the heat through the plastic. They said goodbye and Gail Burke went inside to eat a bowl of Mrs. Muller's secret recipe. She felt her stomach growl with hunger. If it tasted as good as it smelled, maybe she'd have two bowls.
THE END
2023.05.31 16:09 Fit_Address8906 Fragranced Sugar Body Scrub
 | submitted by Fit_Address8906 to goodskintips [link] [comments] |
2023.05.31 16:04 nantes89 How do you avoid under mixing and/or over mixing pancake batter?
I'm trying to get my (banana) pancakes fluffy by reminding myself to not over mix the bubbles out. I time myself 10-20 seconds and until it looks mostly mixed. I also let the batter sit for a little bit. Maybe a couple minutes?
The good news is I am getting very good height; they are fluffy and moist.
The bad news is a couple of them had rather large pockets of dried ingredients folded in.
What should I be doing to avoid this?
For reference, I started with this recipe but added vinegar to the milk and a bit of baking soda to achieve the fluffy effect. I also added a little bit of sugar and melted butter for moisture. All of which worked. But again... occasional pockets of dried ingredients
submitted by nantes89 to AskCulinary [link] [comments]
The good news is I am getting very good height; they are fluffy and moist.
The bad news is a couple of them had rather large pockets of dried ingredients folded in.
What should I be doing to avoid this?
For reference, I started with this recipe but added vinegar to the milk and a bit of baking soda to achieve the fluffy effect. I also added a little bit of sugar and melted butter for moisture. All of which worked. But again... occasional pockets of dried ingredients
2023.05.31 15:33 ComplexRoll9655 Wife's rant
Today's my husbands bday. Normally i do something fairly crazy every few years. This year i preordered certain collectible. It will take much longer to arrive etc. But i never see him put this much effort ever for me. Store flowers, a card.
Mothers day this year hurt, again. Last year i got myself flowers. This year i didnt even bother. He didnt even say "happy mothers day". Nothing on Valentines day. We talked about that at length before she was born, that i want us make memories for her, do events, do special days in the year where we are a family and do stuff.
I did the math, between his work, gaming, streaming and work travel, on average i have a husband and dad a generous 2hours per day. More on weekends. Thats also time for cooking, doing chores etc and time that HE spends getting her ready in the mornings.
When hes with her he just mostly has no patience to explain or teach her why that cant be touched, why that is off limits, why that is etc. He just raises his voice, yankes her around "dont touch, I TOLD YOU NOT TO TOUCH"
My almost two year olds favourite phrase is "DONT TOUCHY" and waving her finger.
Seriously, he speaks to her like a dog. And i cant bring it out without him going "BUT, blaaaaa". One night i actually asked him if he even wants to be a parent because what im seeing is that hes not. He just went defensive, then silent and made a face that he doesnt get where its coming from.
I set an ultimatum, he gets therapy for his anger issues and takes parenting therapy. He hasn't signed up to either yet.
I haze zero energy left for him, or trying to explain why something upsets me because its all met with a "BUT".
During pregnancy he told everyone and their grandma how much i was struggling with gestational hypertension (turned to preeclampsia). I had horrible nausea - hg. My nutritionist sent me a file with recipes to try - i begged my husband to cook them. Does he? He didnt even open it.
He cooks few times, each time selecting something i absolutely cannot handle - like "all butter chicken" cooked in a literal 300g of butter. Taste made me sick - then he used that to say he cant cook anything cause i wont eat it anyway. So we go onto takeouts 3-5 times a week and ofc takeout wasnt gonna make my bp any better!
Best highlight was me asking for 2 months, begging for him to clean the shower because it was slippy, dirty af, and i wasnt steady on my feet. I ended up scrubbing it myself with bleach at almost 6.5 months on all fours and he came in saying "YOU COULDVE JUST ASKED ME"
Second we got married, and i got pregnant he decided to find ANYTHING to occupy himself with instead of spending time with his pregnant wife and baby.
I feel so much resentment you have no idea. I feel rage, i feel like crying - i almost HATE him for all this. It HURTS.
A month ago i send him a text, that we were over if he didnt change something. That he spent last two years getting a new family aka his stream friends but has since shut me and OUR baby out. That all this time he couldve spent growing our relationship he decided to grow a following of strangers (its really not that large mostly his streamer friends watch each others streams)
I came back to work and changed jobs quite instantly. Im working full time, every month i've an infection, tonsillitis or covid. Had covid twice since last july. Took week long sick leave 8 times. Child is off sick all the time from creche so we work and sit with her during work hours and get nothing done. Am 3 months behind my work. I'm struggling, and i'm just drowning.
Few weeks ago out of spite he didnt wake me up - i was so out from no sleep that week (just 1st week back to work after covid where i was coughing up blood) i overslept, he didnt wake me for a reason and i quote "im sick of you relying on me" - i just asked him, if i cant rely on my husband the fudge is this marriage for?
All he does is complain to people how our daughter is SO MUCH WORK, but i buy her clothes, i prepare her clothes, i pack her clothes for creche, he just puts them on in the morning, and 50% time puts her to bed. The other time he complains, raises his voice and taps her hands for playing with water in the dog bowl, trying to lick the floor, trying to touch cables and occasionally trying to touch his lego. All of which couldve been a learning opportunities for the child - like have a conversation why that is a no-no. But no. He's got a "BUT" statement for that too as to how he was in the right.
I only see him paint a picture to everyone else like a loving father and husband, but actions - they are very few, apart absolute basics. And oh the groping - thats how he thinks he shows me love. Groping.
I know that since i had therapy i had outgrown a lot of bs. We had couples therapy so he could catch up to those changes. Its significantly better but also worse - its like hes become more dismissive instead.
Im tired of trying to fix it. I dont know whats left to fix. I just feel lost, hurt, scammed.
submitted by ComplexRoll9655 to TrueOffMyChest [link] [comments]
Mothers day this year hurt, again. Last year i got myself flowers. This year i didnt even bother. He didnt even say "happy mothers day". Nothing on Valentines day. We talked about that at length before she was born, that i want us make memories for her, do events, do special days in the year where we are a family and do stuff.
I did the math, between his work, gaming, streaming and work travel, on average i have a husband and dad a generous 2hours per day. More on weekends. Thats also time for cooking, doing chores etc and time that HE spends getting her ready in the mornings.
When hes with her he just mostly has no patience to explain or teach her why that cant be touched, why that is off limits, why that is etc. He just raises his voice, yankes her around "dont touch, I TOLD YOU NOT TO TOUCH"
My almost two year olds favourite phrase is "DONT TOUCHY" and waving her finger.
Seriously, he speaks to her like a dog. And i cant bring it out without him going "BUT, blaaaaa". One night i actually asked him if he even wants to be a parent because what im seeing is that hes not. He just went defensive, then silent and made a face that he doesnt get where its coming from.
I set an ultimatum, he gets therapy for his anger issues and takes parenting therapy. He hasn't signed up to either yet.
I haze zero energy left for him, or trying to explain why something upsets me because its all met with a "BUT".
During pregnancy he told everyone and their grandma how much i was struggling with gestational hypertension (turned to preeclampsia). I had horrible nausea - hg. My nutritionist sent me a file with recipes to try - i begged my husband to cook them. Does he? He didnt even open it.
He cooks few times, each time selecting something i absolutely cannot handle - like "all butter chicken" cooked in a literal 300g of butter. Taste made me sick - then he used that to say he cant cook anything cause i wont eat it anyway. So we go onto takeouts 3-5 times a week and ofc takeout wasnt gonna make my bp any better!
Best highlight was me asking for 2 months, begging for him to clean the shower because it was slippy, dirty af, and i wasnt steady on my feet. I ended up scrubbing it myself with bleach at almost 6.5 months on all fours and he came in saying "YOU COULDVE JUST ASKED ME"
Second we got married, and i got pregnant he decided to find ANYTHING to occupy himself with instead of spending time with his pregnant wife and baby.
I feel so much resentment you have no idea. I feel rage, i feel like crying - i almost HATE him for all this. It HURTS.
A month ago i send him a text, that we were over if he didnt change something. That he spent last two years getting a new family aka his stream friends but has since shut me and OUR baby out. That all this time he couldve spent growing our relationship he decided to grow a following of strangers (its really not that large mostly his streamer friends watch each others streams)
I came back to work and changed jobs quite instantly. Im working full time, every month i've an infection, tonsillitis or covid. Had covid twice since last july. Took week long sick leave 8 times. Child is off sick all the time from creche so we work and sit with her during work hours and get nothing done. Am 3 months behind my work. I'm struggling, and i'm just drowning.
Few weeks ago out of spite he didnt wake me up - i was so out from no sleep that week (just 1st week back to work after covid where i was coughing up blood) i overslept, he didnt wake me for a reason and i quote "im sick of you relying on me" - i just asked him, if i cant rely on my husband the fudge is this marriage for?
All he does is complain to people how our daughter is SO MUCH WORK, but i buy her clothes, i prepare her clothes, i pack her clothes for creche, he just puts them on in the morning, and 50% time puts her to bed. The other time he complains, raises his voice and taps her hands for playing with water in the dog bowl, trying to lick the floor, trying to touch cables and occasionally trying to touch his lego. All of which couldve been a learning opportunities for the child - like have a conversation why that is a no-no. But no. He's got a "BUT" statement for that too as to how he was in the right.
I only see him paint a picture to everyone else like a loving father and husband, but actions - they are very few, apart absolute basics. And oh the groping - thats how he thinks he shows me love. Groping.
I know that since i had therapy i had outgrown a lot of bs. We had couples therapy so he could catch up to those changes. Its significantly better but also worse - its like hes become more dismissive instead.
Im tired of trying to fix it. I dont know whats left to fix. I just feel lost, hurt, scammed.
2023.05.31 15:31 Kvothfuss Hour Detroit's 2023 Best of Detroit Party is This Weekend (+Ticket Giveaway)
 | Hi Detroit, submitted by Kvothfuss to Detroit [link] [comments] Full disclosure: I am an employee of Hour Detroit magazine. We're metro Detroit's largest monthly magazine, and we focus on food, drink, art, local culture, events, local interest pieces, etc. This weekend Hour Detroit is hosting our 2023 Best of Detroit Party downtown on the first four floors of the Westin Book Cadillac building. This was an annual event has been on hold since the pandemic, but we've brought it back — and, we think, better than ever. If you're looking for something fun to do this weekend (alongside the Grand Prix) we think you'll enjoy this event. Earlier in the year, our readers voted for their top picks in over 200 categories (everything from best restaurants, to best museums, best bars, best news anchors, etc.) This party is to announce and honor the winners of that poll. I'll try to provide as much information as I can in this post, and I'll be here to answer any questions. I'll also be giving away 2 free general admission tickets to a random commenter. TLDR: Hour Detroit magazine is putting on a four floor party on June 2 in Detroit and you're invited. Westin Book Cadillac, Detroit When is the party? VIP: Friday, June 2; 6– 11 p.m. General Admission: Friday, June 2; 7 – 11 p.m. Where is the party? The first four floors of the Westin Book Cadillac building in downtown Detroit. What's included in General Admission? General Admission tickets include unlimited food samples, live entertainment, and 8 drink tickets (full-sized drinks). Doors open at 7pm for the General Admission ticket. How much are tickets? Event tickets are $95 for General Admission and $165 for VIP. Tickets can be purchased here. What's the dress code and theme? This party is one where you want to dress to impress. Summer chic, cocktail attire. The event itself is Grand Prix-themed. EXHIBITING FOOD VENDORS: Achatz Pie – Pie Collective Bar Pigalle Basan Detroit Brie & Bamboo Cacao Tree Cafe Cucina Lab Torino Detroit Royal Sweets / Ichillyn Cafe Edo Ramen Great Lakes Pot Pies Green Lantern Pizza La Marsa Madam Noble Fish Oak & Reel PAO Detroit Priya Indian Cuisine Ray’s Ice Cream Rivertown Market – Meijer San Morello Shinola Hotel Spun Sugar Detroit The Little Salumi ZuZu Zingerman’s Delicatessan SPONSORS: Major 6 Salon Full View Productions Leaf & Bud Rivertown Market – Meijer VisitDetroit Gold 3JS Creative Group Crown Custom Clothing – Tailoring Detroit Royal Sweets Green Lantern Pizza Greko Printing & Imaging iChillyn Cafe Somerset Collection Beverage 8 Mile Vodka Black Spirits Legacy Chandon Faygo Hennesy Moet Automotive Cauley Ferrari of Detroit VIP Lounge ZuZu Branded Lounge Antonino Salon and Spa Busted Bra Shop The Townsend Hotel MUSIC: Annemarie Jo Bruce Bailey George Montrelle Power Play Detroit DJ Isaac Prieto & Javonntte on keys Sound Cocktail Spot Lite Detroit featuring resident DJs Vince Patricola & Jesse Cory Venetian Ballroom at Westin Book Cadillac EVENT PAGES: Get Tickets (Humanatix), Learn more (Hour Detroit) 100% of event processing fees through Humanatix are donated to charity. I hope to see some of you there! |
2023.05.31 14:59 Paul-Belgium 1951 Jello Pudding and Pie Filling advertisement.
 | submitted by Paul-Belgium to vintageads [link] [comments] |
2023.05.31 14:47 My_Cat_Is_Molly Memorial Sugar Maple Sudden Death Follow-Up Pictures
My sugar maple suddenly appears to have died. I planted it as a memorial tree 8 years ago for my late father. I fertilized it and mulched it last year. It grew like crazy but the leaves never changed color last fall. They eventually died and fell off. This spring, I notice some new growth with buds but they appear to have stopped growing. Is it possible the mulch prevented it from going dormant? I live in Zone 3 and we had a very mild fall.
submitted by My_Cat_Is_Molly to arborists [link] [comments]
2023.05.31 14:37 beancanslim Where does this come from?
 | I just can't figure out where the event items are supposed to come from. submitted by beancanslim to AnimalRestaurant [link] [comments] |
2023.05.31 14:31 winterspot214 Is this safe?
 | I’ve heard rationale for why gf products can say “may contain wheat” but still safely be gluten free. This is the first I’ve seen of a gluten free label and a “may contain gluten” statement. I don’t understand this! submitted by winterspot214 to Celiac [link] [comments] |
2023.05.31 14:19 throwaway2019ugh Adobo?
Hi, wondering if anyone has a brand they like or a recipe for chipotle chilis in adobo? All the brands I can find have soybean oil or sugar
submitted by throwaway2019ugh to Paleo [link] [comments]
2023.05.31 14:12 Victor_Quebec How can I know how much dough I need for a spring-form?
I'm trying to guesstimate how much dough I need for my shortcrust pastry, which I'm gonna bake in a new 9-inch (Ø23cm) spring-form. I know that with due diligence one can easily achieve this by adjusting the dough weights and volumes taken from various recipes based on coefficients.
Nevertheless, imagine it's the first-ever shortcrust recipe to be baked in a first-ever spring-form. So, to calculate the weight of the final product (dough), I'm thinking of calculating the total inner area of the form including the sides, then multiply it with the wall thickness of the pastry to find the volume of the dough I need. Then I can get the weight...
But to find the weight of the final dough, I also need to know its density, because weight = density x volume. It's not as simple as deriving it from the densities of flour, fat, salt, sugar and eggs that go into the shortcrust because, perhaps, of the properties of a typical dough. And maybe it's even the craziest way of doing so. What would you suggest? Do bakers even consider such a thing as "dough density"?
Thank you!
submitted by Victor_Quebec to Baking [link] [comments]
Nevertheless, imagine it's the first-ever shortcrust recipe to be baked in a first-ever spring-form. So, to calculate the weight of the final product (dough), I'm thinking of calculating the total inner area of the form including the sides, then multiply it with the wall thickness of the pastry to find the volume of the dough I need. Then I can get the weight...
But to find the weight of the final dough, I also need to know its density, because weight = density x volume. It's not as simple as deriving it from the densities of flour, fat, salt, sugar and eggs that go into the shortcrust because, perhaps, of the properties of a typical dough. And maybe it's even the craziest way of doing so. What would you suggest? Do bakers even consider such a thing as "dough density"?
Thank you!
2023.05.31 14:05 AndyGarvin An entire 8x8 tray of brownies for 468 calories and 33 grams of protein!
 | I bought a package of Lakanto mix at Big Lots for $5 on a whim. They were so good that I went back the next day and bought a few more! submitted by AndyGarvin to Volumeeating [link] [comments] The recipe on the package calls for oil and eggs because it is meant for people on the Keto diet. I made some substitutions since I'm not concerned with net carbs. Cronometer doesn't track the cooking spray that I used as anything, but that adds a small amount of calories. Macros for whole pan: 468 kcal 33.1g protein 30.8g net carbs 0.0g fat Recipe: 1 package Lakanto brownie mix 1/2 cups Chobani zero sugar vanilla greek yogurt 3 servings Great Value egg whites 1 Tbsp Truvia sweetener. Preheat oven to 350°F Mix the greek yogurt, egg whites, and sweetener in a bowl. Add the brownie mix and continue to mix until smooth. Spray an 8x8 pan and pour the brownie mix in. Bake for 30 minutes. (Or 35 minutes for extra firmness) I would not recommend that you eat the whole pan at once. These brownies are amazing, but they have a ton of fiber. I ate the whole thing at once, and a few hours later, I was fighting for my life in the bathroom. This delicious fudgy slice of heaven had me in the trenches for real. Stick to half the pan or less in one sitting. Enjoy! |
2023.05.31 14:03 chicken_tendes Can my ringneck eat this? Couldnt find any specific ringneck food
 | submitted by chicken_tendes to parrots [link] [comments] |
2023.05.31 13:09 Fit_Address8906 Fragranced Sugar Body Scrub
2023.05.31 12:53 RaccHudson [Wildcat's Revenge] Element-by-Element Review
![[Wildcat's Revenge] Element-by-Element Review](https://b.thumbs.redditmedia.com/WSDnON-vE5U-N2ByPiZ5TjK-kf-gjZpPYVb35vSVhdg.jpg "[Wildcat's Revenge] Element-by-Element Review") | submitted by RaccHudson to rollercoasters [link] [comments] https://reddit.com/link/13wiucc/video/7m2720niy63b1/player I hope that you will come to beautiful central Pennsylvania, and ride the Panther's Retribution at Hershey's Park. Here is what you can anticipate to experience: Aesthetics I'm just going to give it time to grow on me. I don't like it. The station is ugly and the coolest looking parts of the ride itself, most notably the mix of original and new wood supporting the underflip, are only visible from outside the park. Kinda bunk. The park interaction aspect is improved slightly with the zero-g rolls replacing the helix but original Wildcat suffered from being a parking lot coaster with basically none of the park interactions that make The Hollow so amazing, and it's really hard to blame RMC for not magically fixing that. I'm an optimist so either I'll think it's less ugly later or they'll make it less ugly later. Queue The first half and at least a part of the lone switchback area, which sees you snaking back and forth about 8-10 times, is shaded by some but not quite enough trees. Much of the original Wildcat queue is reused, so it should feel familiar to most returning guests. Easily the standout 'feature' of the queue is the vantage point it provides you of the ride. Nearly all quality footage you'll see of this ride will be shot from somewhere inside this queue, and the flyby as the train rockets through the second wave turn and double down is almost as incredible as the head of steam the train carry into the brake run overhead. For a person you likes to gawk at the ride while waiting through the line, it's hard to get much better- but then again, Twisted Timbers does have you snaking through its infield and under elements, so that's hard to compete against. On that note, Twisted Timbers is the only other RMC I have to compare this against. For a review from a more seasoned RMC rider I suggest you watch The Coaster Spot's first reaction who ranked it \#2 behind Steel Vengeance and apparently ahead of Iron Gwaz. The double-sided lockers are right before the stairs leading up to the station platform, and they're pretty big for free lockers tbh. Your whole group could potentially share one. Fast Lane does seem to go right up to the lockers so, be mad or excited about that depending upon your discretionary spending capabilities. Station This is where the train lives. No- I'm sorry. This is where the train works, it lives in the barn. The station looks like a Pizza Hut, which may or may not have been intentional, and may or may not be part of the theme. Pizza Hut could be who Wildcat is Vengeancing. We don't even know the lore. The ride is very new and nobody has put in the work. I don't know. The interior is pretty dull, but can I tell you how? No, I don't remember any single detail about the interior of the station whatsoever. My best guess why is that it was super dull. Pre-Lift Kitty got things started off with a bang. It would be easy to overstate this moment by saying it gives three pops of rapid-fire airtime. Trust me: that sounds cooler than it feels. But it does make for a solid stinger to get your blood pumping, if somehow it weren't already. From moment one, even as its just trying to get you to the lift hill about fifteen yard away, this ride wants you to know that it means business. Lift Hill Anybody who appreciated the original view from Wildcat's lifthill will be glad to know that nothing about this lift hill compromises that. The lift was not near as obnoxious loud as I remember Twisted Timbers being, and consistently started at half-speed during three-train operations before transitioning to full speed- though sometimes not until at least halfway up. As a little bit of coaster trivia, this part of the ride provides the potential energy necessary to complete the ride course. Correct me if I'm wrong. First Drop If you were terrified of being let down by this coaster, I think first drop would have you realizing your deepest fears. While it is a very solid first drop, it is going to be impossible for it not to be compared to one of the best first drops in the country on Skyrush. And that's not where it ends. If I'm not mistaken, which I swear to God has never happened before, Wildcat's first drop is the fourth tallest in the park- and probably the fourth best too. I did get to experience this drop in the next-to-last row, and I want to be clear: it slaps. But this is one case where I feel it's going to be difficult for anybody not to be underwhelmed by it either because they've done RMCs with better drops, or they've already done one or two rides *in this park* that were better. But if you're able to numb yourself to any bias, you'll love the ejector for what it is. Underflip Here is where we introduce the best things this ride has going for it, and the biggest issues for my review: sense of speed and disorientation. I don't think "force numb" is a common concept with enthusiasts, but I would describe it as a diminished sense of proprioception induced by disorientation or sense of speed. I think this is one major reason why some rides get better or worse with re-rides as you overcome that force numbness and can appreciate, or dislike, more of the ride. And with the coaster hitting its max speed before immediately launching into its upward counter-clockwise spin, I can't say I felt the same lateral whip that everybody else did- but I'm certain that's not because it was there, it's because Wildcat's Revenge already had me neck-deep in what I feel at the two star forces of this ride. The drop out of the underflip is a moment I was hopeful for some unexpected airtime, but I didn't feel any, but with the ride immediately diving back down to just above ground level there's still plenty to enjoy. Camelback Airtime Hill Undoubtedly the strongest moment of airtime on the ride, in the back row the airtime seemed to start about halfway over the hill but then kept me out out of my seat for what felt like ages. Although the negative Gs were incredible, my favorite detail of this element is not dissimilar from what also makes one of the better airtime moment on Skyrush: a high-speed headchopper. Despite how much it feels like copied homework, the sight of being hurled face first into the black steel of the upcoming stall gave me the first real spine-tingling *holy fuck* moment of the ride, the structure coming into view and narrowly buzzing by. First Wave Turn Spoiler alert, but at the end of this review I'm going to say that what makes this ride so amazing is the near lack of filler moments that feel more like transitions between elements than elements of themselves. The cute little outer bank leading into this wave turn is one of the few things that make me have to use that word 'near.' Maybe on later rides, with the ride running faster or myself just less force numb, something about it will reveal itself. But despite sitting on the left side to get the more aggressive end of this element, it felt like little more that a little bump in the road. But you'll feel more force and get more airtime driving 10 miles over the speed limit on 522 through Belleville. But the wave turn itself, my first proper wave turn, was a revelation. Visually, these wave turn elements had never looked very substantial- and just seemed like a really inefficient way to get some negative Gs. But the pacing of the lateral whip, into positives, and into airtime before reversing the pattern out of it adds a wildly fun variety to the sensations. It would not be fair to call this a 'low-point,' but front to back this was the closest this ride ever felt to relenting in its pace by even the slightest bit- but I want you to understand. That does not mean this part feels slow. That means the rest of it feels very, very fast. Stall Speaking of fast, this is one element I was initially skeptical of, but I blame Steel Curtain. After Steel Curtain's 'stall' felt like little more than a zero-g roll that changed its mind halfway, I was worried that this still might just happen too fast to have any real sense of hangtime. However, it is a little bit visually misleading, as the exit of the stall is higher than the entrance, so after you bottom out from the first wave turn you immediately begin that half-spin and continue rising as you hang. It is not at all what I would describe hangtime feeling like on something like Copperhead Strike or Shellraiser- it feels more as if you were on an inverted floater airtime hill. In the back row, the feeling of the ride gaining speed even while still inverted was wild. That transitioned into the beginning of what was, for at least my one (1) official ride, my favorite sequence of elements on the ride- The Second Wave Turn Entering the tight right-hand turn into the second wave turn I found myself folded left-forward, to about 10:00 on a clock face. Turning you over onto your side, the second wave turn then delivers what I believed was, if not the strongest, the *sharpest* moment of airtime on the ride, before folding me once more in the same direction. Off-ride in the queue, it is an amazing sight to watch this element. Everybody has seen coaster structure bend and sway- this wave turn *breaths.* The sheer force of the trains entering into the turn push it outward, and when they blaze through the bump itself the structure is yanked inward against itself in a wave before exiting into another right hand turn bending the structure backwards again. They say a picture is worth a thousand words, but I don't think I could craft the imagery that would satisfy to describe this force to you that you wouldn't better understand by watching a video, or going and seeing for yourself this great beast of a structure inhaling you like a mayfly on millennium force and spitting you out into the double-down. The Double Down But I said my favorite sequence of elements- that was just the first half. The encore comes in the double down, which gives you an abrupt pop of airtime before rudely interjecting it with a punch of laterals that continue even as you're being lifted back out of your seat for a second, more substantial pop of airtime. Imagine like you got about 25% through an airtime hill before Wildcat grabs your hand to yank you in the direction you were *supposed* to be going. When I was a kid, Wildcat was my #1 rollercoaster, and it was for a very simple reason: It felt like it could fly off the tracks at any time. Not any other roller coaster I had ridden in my young life, including the newly-built Great Bear, had anything close to that sensation. This sequence between the second wave turn and into the first zero-g roll is the closest this ride gets to recreating that sensation- between the rapid-fire transition of forces and the manic and impulsive behavior of the double down this ride feels like it wants to escape. Skyrush feels like it wants to punt you- Wildcat's Revenge feels like it wants to bolt off from the track entirely and sprint back into the mountains it came from, and it doesn't care if you're strapped to its back, you're coming along for the ride. First Zero-G Roll This bowl section serves as the climax of the ride much the same as it did for the original Wildcat, and Wildcat takes its revenge with a full head of steam. It hardly feels like it slows down as it whips you up and over itself, feeling as if it wants to leap over the wall entirely and make its dash for freedom, before pulling into the tight lefthand turn and the only other element of the ride that comes close to feeling like filler, and overbank turn that sits square between Zero G rolls one and two. Second Zero-G Roll I felt this one was even faster than the first, and twisting through the structure as you do, one of the few things to genuinely catch me by surprise happened: the exit of the second roll drops out from underneath you into a curved double down, eerily reminiscent (to me, at least) of the infamous kink in the helix Wildcat 96 traversed after its station fly-by. Run Into Brakes Although the roll-bookended helix serves as the climax of the ride, Wildcat doesn't let its denouement fall flat. As you're turning sharply to the right the track lifts up and straightens out for one more ejector airtime moment, and an appropriately strong one at that. I love when rides end with one last smack of airtime, just to show you they've still got it, and while the profiling is completely different it reminds me in a lot of ways of Copperhead Strike's final airtime moment in how it will have the ability to take you by surprise with one of the strongest, if least sustained, moments of airtime. But that pales in comparison to the brake run. First of all, brake runs are elements. Do or don't @ me it won't change reality. Some rides have better brake runs than others. The best brake run? Well of the ones I've been on, Superman: Ride of Steel at Six Flags America. And while I don't think Wildcat's Revenge manages to quite surpass it (both have a final pop of airtime leading into it, but Rossy has an airtime hill while Wildcat just has the pop up into the brakes) it is definitely up there with the best. The fold you feel on the engagement of the brakes is every bit as immediate and strong as on Rossy. The best thing about this ride is its unrelenting sense of speed, and the way you hit the brakes does not belie that. And despite hitting the brakes with about as much sense of speed as anything I've ridden outside of I305, the actual engagement of the brakes is extremely smooth. Unfortunately, it sounds nothing like a seal. Overview What you're not going to quite get from my going through each element and saying how great they all are is, unfortunately, the only thing that really matters about this ride: How it just doesn't stop. Wildcat's Revenge has, in my opinion an elite sense of speed and doesn't relent through its entire course. Not far behind the sense of speed however is the sense of disorientation provided by not only the four inversions, but also the twister nature of the layout that rarely sees you traveling in a straight line and rightside-up. So in my mind, this coaster is elite even before you start a conversation about airtime, positives, laterals- which it has in absolute spades, too. No attraction is universally appealing, but I think a lot of people, and a lot of roller coaster enthusiasts especially, are going to come off this ride extremely pleased and while I don't think we're gonna start seeing the phrase "Wildcat-killer" out there Hersheypark certainly has a winner on its hands |
2023.05.31 12:52 dumbbuttloserface how do i get these facilities?
 | the event has started for me but i’m still unable to buy the facilities that are locked to the event starting today. anyone know what the deal is? submitted by dumbbuttloserface to AnimalRestaurant [link] [comments] |
2023.05.31 11:00 bodyshopindia Tips to Use Face Scrub - An Ultimate Guide
Exfoliation is one of the most important steps of any skincare routine but still avoided by many people. The accumulated dead skin on your face may make your skin dull and lead to many skin issues. Simple washing your face with water or face wash isn’t enough to get rid of stubborn dead skin. Hence, experts recommend including a good natural face scrub at least twice a week helps to gently remove the dead cells, bring out the inner glow, make your skin radiant, and heal it from within.
However, there is a huge variety of products available in the market, and choosing the wrong product might worsen your skin. Hence, in this blog, we will share some helpful tips to choose the best face scrub, how to use a face scrub, and some recommended best face scrubs for glowing skin.
What exactly is exfoliation?
Exfoliation is a skin-care treatment in which dead skin cells are removed from the top layer of your skin. Exfoliation helps brighten your complexion by eliminating this layer of debris from your skin and allowing your skin-care products to penetrate deeper into your skin (making them perform better).
It may soften your skin and lessen your risk of acne because dead skin cells can gather and clog your pores. Exfoliation is especially beneficial as we age and cell turnover slows, as it keeps the process moving and stops the skin from looking lifeless.
What are the different types of exfoliation?
Mechanical exfoliation: When you use exfoliating tools like a washcloth or rotating brush or a face scrub cream to remove the dead skin from your face and provide clear bright skin.
According to some experts, the finer the particle, the better off you'll be because it's less abrasive.
Chemical exfoliators: In chemical exfoliators alpha hydroxy acids (AHAs) or beta hydroxy acids (BHAs) are included to dissolve the sticky glue that keeps these cells together. Retinoids, according to skin experts, can also be termed exfoliants because they work to accelerate cell turnover.
The optimal exfoliation procedure for you is determined by your tastes as well as the type of skin you have (more on that later). However, dermatologists now recommend chemical exfoliation over mechanical methods, especially because scrubs have the potential to cause small tears in the skin.
How frequently should you exfoliate your skin?
Less is more, as a general rule. Always ensure to be gentle on your skin while exfoliating your skin to get a glowing face and avoid rubbing it harshly, it may damage your skin. The frequency with which you should exfoliate is determined by your skin type.
For sensitive skin: People with sensitive skin often have difficulty obtaining non-irritating facial skin-care products. Their skin frequently turns red and becomes irritated. If this describes you, experts recommend avoiding exfoliating entirely. If you must exfoliate, try a creamy cleanser with a low amount of glycolic acid once a week.
For oily skin: Those with oily skin may see a faint sheen on their face early in the day. And if you're prone to acne or feel like your pores are frequently clogged, this is usually a symptom of high sebum production, which is connected with oily skin. Use an AHA-based cleanser two to three times per week and a face peel pad once per week as part of your regimen. Alternatively, you could gradually increase your retinoid use every day.
Dermatologists recommend exfoliating twice a week with a retinoid or an AHA or BHA cleanser for normal to mixed skin.
Recommended Best Face Scrubs
Edelweiss Liquid Peel
Edelweiss Liquid Peel is filled with the goodness of 95% natural ingredients that gently cleanse your skin and remove the accumulated dead skin from your face. Edelweiss is known for its natural antioxidant properties due to the high concentration of leontopodic acid. It is an idle product for all skin types including sensitive skin and can be used by women of the 25-40 age group.
Vitamin C Glow-Revealing Liquid Peel
Vitamin C Glow-Revealing Liquid Peel is an amazing product by The Body Shop, that not only exfoliates your skin to bring out the lost glow but also nourishes your skin and provides it with the necessary nutrients to keep it healthy. This formula also keeps the pH level of your skin in check so that you won’t experience any irritation.
submitted by bodyshopindia to u/bodyshopindia [link] [comments]
However, there is a huge variety of products available in the market, and choosing the wrong product might worsen your skin. Hence, in this blog, we will share some helpful tips to choose the best face scrub, how to use a face scrub, and some recommended best face scrubs for glowing skin.
What exactly is exfoliation?
Exfoliation is a skin-care treatment in which dead skin cells are removed from the top layer of your skin. Exfoliation helps brighten your complexion by eliminating this layer of debris from your skin and allowing your skin-care products to penetrate deeper into your skin (making them perform better).
It may soften your skin and lessen your risk of acne because dead skin cells can gather and clog your pores. Exfoliation is especially beneficial as we age and cell turnover slows, as it keeps the process moving and stops the skin from looking lifeless.
What are the different types of exfoliation?
Mechanical exfoliation: When you use exfoliating tools like a washcloth or rotating brush or a face scrub cream to remove the dead skin from your face and provide clear bright skin.
According to some experts, the finer the particle, the better off you'll be because it's less abrasive.
Chemical exfoliators: In chemical exfoliators alpha hydroxy acids (AHAs) or beta hydroxy acids (BHAs) are included to dissolve the sticky glue that keeps these cells together. Retinoids, according to skin experts, can also be termed exfoliants because they work to accelerate cell turnover.
The optimal exfoliation procedure for you is determined by your tastes as well as the type of skin you have (more on that later). However, dermatologists now recommend chemical exfoliation over mechanical methods, especially because scrubs have the potential to cause small tears in the skin.
How frequently should you exfoliate your skin?
Less is more, as a general rule. Always ensure to be gentle on your skin while exfoliating your skin to get a glowing face and avoid rubbing it harshly, it may damage your skin. The frequency with which you should exfoliate is determined by your skin type.
For sensitive skin: People with sensitive skin often have difficulty obtaining non-irritating facial skin-care products. Their skin frequently turns red and becomes irritated. If this describes you, experts recommend avoiding exfoliating entirely. If you must exfoliate, try a creamy cleanser with a low amount of glycolic acid once a week.
For oily skin: Those with oily skin may see a faint sheen on their face early in the day. And if you're prone to acne or feel like your pores are frequently clogged, this is usually a symptom of high sebum production, which is connected with oily skin. Use an AHA-based cleanser two to three times per week and a face peel pad once per week as part of your regimen. Alternatively, you could gradually increase your retinoid use every day.
Dermatologists recommend exfoliating twice a week with a retinoid or an AHA or BHA cleanser for normal to mixed skin.
Recommended Best Face Scrubs
Edelweiss Liquid Peel
Edelweiss Liquid Peel is filled with the goodness of 95% natural ingredients that gently cleanse your skin and remove the accumulated dead skin from your face. Edelweiss is known for its natural antioxidant properties due to the high concentration of leontopodic acid. It is an idle product for all skin types including sensitive skin and can be used by women of the 25-40 age group.
Vitamin C Glow-Revealing Liquid Peel
Vitamin C Glow-Revealing Liquid Peel is an amazing product by The Body Shop, that not only exfoliates your skin to bring out the lost glow but also nourishes your skin and provides it with the necessary nutrients to keep it healthy. This formula also keeps the pH level of your skin in check so that you won’t experience any irritation.